


Prison Blues

by Drago



Category: Gotham (TV), Shameless (US)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Asphyxiation, Cussing, Daddy Kink, Dirty Talk, Dubious Consent, Explicit Language, Gallavich Endgame, Happy Ending, Jealous!Ian, Jealous!Mickey, Jerome has a knife and he isn't afraid to use it, M/M, Mentions of Rape, Mickey finally gets to explore his kinks, Mickey is a good brother, Misunderstandings, Murder, Rimming, Violence, mentions of STD, mentions of bipolar disorder, not IxM though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-17
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-11 19:32:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 22,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21459115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drago/pseuds/Drago
Summary: Ian wants some of his freedom back, that's all. He isn't breaking up with Mickey, but he needs some space.If only Mickey understood that.
Relationships: Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich, Mandy Milkovich & Mickey Milkovich, Mickey Milkovich/Jerome Valeska
Comments: 52
Kudos: 277





	1. Chapter 1

Prison isn’t nearly as bad as Ian imagined it to be. It’s not _good_ or pleasant, but it’s not bad either. Freedom is what he misses the most, as he should, but before he went in his mind was clouded by the worry that other inmates will take too much interest in him. No matter how tall or buff he gets, there is something about him that makes people mistake him for a dumb twink. But it’s been over two months now, and so far he managed to avoid being jumped. There’s been some heckling and taunting, but nothing he couldn’t handle on his own.  
It helps that Mickey managed to establish a good position before Ian joined him. There is also the fact that he fights with Mickey so much that the others might be taking pity on him. It doesn’t get physical like when they were kids, but sometimes he wishes it did. It would be less painful than the words they hurl at each other during their daily fights.  
Because Mickey’s presence, while helps a lot, makes things difficult as well. Ian isn’t a child that needs to be coddled, and Mickey insists on sticking to him everywhere he goes, for protection. It’s stifling. It feels like when Ian got sick and they were just trying to piece him together again. He is no longer that person. His meds are working.  
They eat, sleep, work and shit together. It’s completely different from when they lived in one house. That, he enjoyed, because he could go out whenever he wanted, he had a job that kept him busy during the day. And now he just wants some air, that’s all. Being locked up together isn’t good for their relationship, and Ian wants them to work this time. He also wants some of his freedom back, so what.  
So he tells Mickey about it. Maybe his wording isn’t the best, but he is just so exhausted. Mickey’s initial reaction is one that he expects. Anger. Hurt. Betrayal. Then his face goes completely blank.  
“Whatever, fine. I’ll still keep an eye on you. Come to me if someone tries anything.”  
“What? Just like that?”  
“Yeah. You think I didn’t expect that?” Mickey cocks an eyebrow. “You really think I’m dumb, huh. I knew you’d drop me the second you felt more comfortable, I knew the risks. I’m here to help you, I know you don’t give a fuck about me, I’m just a convenient hole, I know you’ve had plenty of those.”  
“Jesus, no, that’s not what it is, Mick. I just...”  
“Fuck you, Gallagher. I get it.”  
Ian is left alone in their cell. It doesn’t feel like a win, but it doesn’t feel entirely bad either. Without Mickey around, he can finally make friends. Before, the older man would scare everyone away with his scowling face and clenched fists. Mickey has his acquaintances, lackeys, but Ian never got to properly meet anyone. And Ian can’t imagine spending two years in prison without any friends, it’s not him.  
He won’t admit it out loud, but he does think about everything Mickey taught him about prison while deciding on who he wants to befriend. He doesn’t go for the smallest fish at the bottom of the food chain, he would be seen as one of them and someone would try to make a bitch out of him. No, he goes for those who are tough enough to defend themselves, but not so dangerous that they will get him in trouble.  
Mickey watches over him, like he said he would. It angers Ian at first, he doesn’t need protection, but there isn’t much he can do about it. Even if he tried to avoid the older man, Mickey knows the prison like the back of his hand, and he would find Ian in no time. And, after a while, Ian decides that it does give him some comfort. He is free to talk to whoever he wants, but no one will fuck with him.  
Ian didn’t think they’d stop talking, but that’s exactly what happens. Mickey doesn’t talk to him anymore, leaves the cell when Ian tries to explain himself or simply talk about his day. But, weirdly enough, Micky doesn’t seem heartbroken. It’s like he truly expected Ian to leave him again, and Ian is a little mad he didn’t surprise him. A little sad.  
He gets into his first prison fight. He doesn’t start it, he is smarter than that, but he definitely finishes it, knuckles bloodied and bruised. It feels good, even if he gets a shot in his file. The other guys seem more wary of him after that, or at least that’s what Ian believes until Jacob, one of his new acquaintances, brings him back to reality by saying, “You know that they stay away from you because of Milkovich, right? He managed to leave a pretty good impression before you came in, that little pitbull of yours.”  
“Mickey? Leaving a ‘good’ impression on anyone?”  
“Our definition of good is a bit different, innit? He left it with his fists.”  
“Ah, fuck. And here I thought I was getting some street cred.”  
“Dream on,” Jacob snorts. “Move your ass, we’ve got five minutes before we have to be in the laundry room.”  
Ian is grateful for something to do, but he would have liked something like a library or maybe gardening. Anything, but the laundry. He knows that prison is about punishment, but there should be a limit to how exhausting, boring and mind-numbing a job can be. He doesn’t understand how Mickey, of all people, gets to work in the library, while he has to slave over their dirty clothes. Maybe Mickey slept with someone again to earn some favors. He probably fucking did.  
Ian is taken aback by his own jealousy. He knows Mickey’s sexual history is as extensive as his, if not more. He used to be jealous of the girls Mickey slept with, even though he knew they were and meant nothing, but Mickey now is not the same as he was when he was a teenager. He is a little softer, a little more open. Even without asking, Ian knows Mickey fucked other guys, maybe got fucked by them. It shouldn’t bother him, but it does.  
Because Mickey never told him about Mexico.

***

As much as he hates to admit it, Terry was right. Prison is boring. At least when you’re trying to avoid trouble. That’s what Ian is mostly doing, excluding the minor scuffles, he stays in his lane. He doesn’t want to stay in prison for two whole years, so as exciting as drug dealing might seem – and frankly, everything other than doing laundry or playing chess seems exciting at this point, he is not going to do anything illegal. Surprisingly, Mickey also seems to be keeping to himself. He is selling drugs, but not enough for anyone to take interest in him. Enough to keep him relevant.  
Mickey’s sentence is longer than his, but it’s not something Ian wants to think about.  
There’s a lot he doesn’t want to think about, but it’s difficult when there is nothing else to focus on. He thinks about Mandy, they haven’t talked in a long while, and Ian isn’t sure whose fault is that. Probably his. Most definitely his. She called him couple times after she left, then he missed some calls and forgot to call her back later. Then the calls stopped coming, but Ian was too busy to notice. When he finally did, all he got was a generic message – _We're sorry; you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service..._ He doesn’t even have Mandy’s number to tell her how much he misses her.  
Fiona is also on his mind a lot, but at least she keeps in touch, updating him on her adventures. To be completely honest, she is doing much better than he expected. He thought she wouldn’t last a month and would crawl back to Chicago before they truly noticed she was gone. But apparently Fiona is more determined than that. Good for her, it must be easier now that she doesn’t have to worry about anyone else anymore. They used to weigh her down, he supposes, even if they didn’t mean to – but he has to admit that all of them abused Fiona’s willingness to do just about anything for them at least once.  
Svetlana… Now that’s someone he actively tries to forget. It’s not even about her but Yevgeny. At one point he was Yev’s second father, but he gave it up the second Mickey disappeared from his life. He was under no obligation to continue taking care of Yevy, at least that’s what Lip keeps telling him, but Ian was the one who wanted to do it and pressured Mickey into being a somewhat decent dad. Now he doesn’t even know where Svetlana is. So much for his meddling, and so much for playing a good guy.  
Turns out that for a gay guy, Ian thinks a lot about women.

It takes him by surprise when he sees Mickey watch other men. Watching them like he needs something from them, something he wouldn’t admit to few years back. His eyes linger on their muscled arms flexing while they talk animatedly with other inmates, gliding down to their covered cocks, probably trying to gauge if they’re big enough to satisfy him.  
Ian notices them as well, of course he does, he didn’t go blind, but it seems too dangerous. He doesn’t know how to read people here. But Mickey… he has Ian right next to him, his body sculpted and dick almost too big, yet he is still looking. Maybe it’s Ian’s fault, but he didn’t think Mickey would start looking as soon as they stopped having sex. He expected more loyalty. And, apparently, he’s been completely wrong because Mick has no qualms about eye-fucking men who look nothing like Ian.   
Ian waits fifteen minutes after the lights go out for the night before making his way down to Mick’s bed. He probably should wait longer, but he doesn’t want to startle Mickey if the older man falls asleep. The night guards are too lazy to check up on them more than once during their shift, so he should be safe until 1:30.  
Ian’s senses go insane when he is close enough to Mickey to smell him. It gets him every time, he would wear Mickey’s scent as a perfume if someone managed to bottle it up. Ian closes his eyes in pleasure, burying his nose in Mick’s short hair. The other man doesn’t move, but his whole body tenses.  
“What are you doing?” he finally asks, when Ian’s hand sneak to the front to fondle his soft cock.  
“I saw you checking out guys today,” Ian murmurs, trying to keep bitterness out of his voice.  
“So?” Mickey doesn’t even try to deny it. “I’m sure you already fucked your share of twinks.”  
“I fucking didn’t. We’re on a break, not broken up!”  
“Sure, because I can trust that. You say we’re on a break, but your hand is currently on my dick. You think I’m gonna believe that you didn’t fuck anyone else?”  
“I don’t want to fuck anyone else,” Ian insists.  
“You did before.”  
“I don’t want to fight with you right now.”  
“What do you want then?”  
“You. I want to feel you.”  
Mickey is silent for so long that Ian thinks the older man fell asleep, but when he moves to get off the cot, Mickey grabs his hand.  
“We can fuck. You don’t have to talk to me, but we can fuck. Grab the condom.”  
Ian hates it, but he retrieves the offending item knowing that Mickey won’t have sex with him without it. He learned it the first time they have sex after their unexpected reunion.

_It doesn’t go as smoothly as Ian expected. If there is one thing they always excelled at, it was sex. And the sex is still fine, but what happens before slightly throws him off._  
_He is lying between Mickey’s strong thighs, not an ounce of fat left on them anymore, kissing him hungrily, when the older man presses something into his hand. By the size and shape of it, Ian knows it’s a condom._  
_“Do you want me to put it on you? If you’re worried about the mess I can lick it off you later,” he murmurs, remembering the salty sweetness of Mickey’s cum that he always enjoyed. He conceals a shiver, not wanting to show how eager he is._  
_“No, man, put it on your dick.”_  
_“What? Why?”_  
_“For safety.”_  
_It’s too dark for Ian to look in Mickey’s eyes, but he is sure he wouldn’t like what he saw in them anyway. They never used condoms when they were younger, even when they were still fucking other people. It wasn’t smart, but they trusted each other to stay safe. And now, after all those years… It feels like betrayal._  
_“Are you kidding me? Mick, it’s me, why would we need a fucking condom?”_  
_“I don’t know where you’ve been. You don’t know who I fucked. I don’t really want another STD.”_  
_“What STD?”_  
_“Do you really want to talk about it now?”_  
_“Yeah, I fucking do,” Ian spits out angrily. He almost wishes his dick wasn’t hard, but he can’t help it when Mickey is so close to him, smelling so good._  
_“Come on, you know I got STD from you when you were manic.”_  
_“Jesus, no, I didn’t fucking know.”_  
_“You didn’t have it treated?”_  
_“I did, but I thought I got it later… I didn’t know I passed it on to you. Fuck, I’m so fucking sorry.”_  
_“It’s fine, it was something minor anyway, but...”_  
_But now Mickey doesn’t trust him anymore, not after everything Ian has done to him, so he wants to use protection. It makes sense, but Ian wants to scream. He can’t stop thinking about it even when he is finally inside Mickey. He fooled himself into thinking his actions have no consequences, but it’s very clear he was wrong, and not just because he is behind the bars._

Mickey insists they don’t have to talk to be able to fuck. Which is true, they’ve done plenty of that in the past. So they ignore each other during the day and fuck at night. Most of the time they have to limit themselves to handjobs and blowjobs because there are only so many condoms they can scrounge up. Mickey is really good a blowjobs now. Ian loves and despises it. Wondering who taught his man to suck dick like an expensive whore keeps him up at night. Mickey was alright at it before they broke up, it’s not like Ian needs much to get off, but now he doesn’t even gag when Ian fucks his face.  
Mickey is too fucking good at sticking to his promise and avoiding Ian.  
Ian wants to talk to him about it, but it was his idea to take a break, and it’s been only few weeks. He will look like an idiot if he takes it back. He will look weak.  
“Something is happening,” Pedro says quietly, bringing Ian back from his reverie. They’re trying to eat lunch, but it’s not going too well, mostly because the food is rather disgusting today, more so than usually.  
“What do you mean?”  
“I heard rumors that they’re moving someone from the other unit.”  
“How is that even possible?”  
There is a reason they’re separated from the other unit, as far as Ian knows most guys there are murderers and drug lords. No one you’d want to mess with.  
“I don’t know, but it’s really fucking weird.”  
Ian wouldn’t say he is worried, but in the following days the whole prison seems to be buzzing with anxiety and anticipation. Something is finally happening, and it almost gives him the rush he needs. He doesn’t plan on getting involved with the new guy, but maybe he will provide some additional entertainment. Something to talk about.  
“Got some news,” Jacob announces, turning his face away from the unwashed piles of clothes. Inmates don’t smell like flowers at their best, but sometimes it’s just too rank for them to handle. “About the guy. It’s pretty fucking nasty.”  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah, man. Remember the string of killings in the New Jersey area? The dude is said to be responsible for most of them. It was a gang or something, but he was their main instigator.”  
“What is he doing in Chicago then?”  
“They caught him here, and apparently they were afraid he will escape if they try to transfer him somewhere else. He was on a speedy trial too.”  
“And how many people did he kill?”  
“That’s what makes everything so fucking weird. No one knows for sure, but it’s at least twenty. Twenty. So why are they moving him here? I stole some cars, why would they put me in with a mass murderer?” there’s a bit of hysteria in Jacob’s voice which Ian doesn’t get. There’s no reason for a serial killer to take interest in someone like Jacob when there are far more intriguing people around.  
“Maybe he ratted someone out.”  
“Still wouldn’t warrant him a transfer,” Pedro mutters, making Ian realize he is the only one who isn’t too concerned about it.

It turns out he should have been, but for a much different reason than anyone would have expected. They transfer the new guy on Tuesday, but no one sees him until Friday. And Ian is the one who gets the privilege of meeting him first.  
He is sitting on a bench smoking, face raised towards the sun like a sunflower, trying to get as much of it as he can in the limited time he’s got. Pedro and Jacob have a meeting with their respective probation officers. Ian is meeting his on Friday. The bitch is crazy, but there’s nothing he can do about it other than stop himself from hitting her. The only thing that really stops him is the fact that she’d probably like it, and that’s just fucking gross.  
“The air on this side is so much fresher,” someone says conversationally, and Ian flinches in surprise. He didn’t hear anyone coming. “Ah, yes, it tastes so sweet, mmm.”  
Ian lowers his face to look at the man, but he doesn’t recognize him. He hasn’t even seen him around, and he would have noticed, if only because of how tall and freakishly pale he is. His skin looks like it’s been heavily powdered and there are few small scars on his otherwise handsome face. They make him look unsettling.  
“Who...”  
“I’m sure you’ve heard of me already. Men can be really loud, such gossips!”  
This is the man Jacob told him about. The serial killer. He looks the part, or at least his eyes do.  
“You probably wonder why I moved here?” he continues, even though Ian barely said anything. He makes it sound like it was his choice, but that’s not how things work in prison. He is no longer looking at Ian, his eyes focused somewhere else. “The view here is so much better, and I just couldn’t resist getting closer. I’m sure you know what I mean.”  
Confused, Ian tears his eyes away from the man’s face and follows his gaze.  
“What the fuck...” he mutters when he sees Mickey standing alone in a corner, smoking the last of his cigarette.


	2. Chapter 2

Mickey’s moans as he comes are slightly high-pitched and almost enough for Ian to get hard again, even though he hasn’t pulled out yet. He loves the way Mickey sounds when he is overwhelmed by pleasure, won’t ever get over the fact that a Southside thug could moan so prettily for him and him only. It drives him mad in more ways than one.  
He puts a hand on Mickey’s lower belly when the older man tries to move away, keeping him in place. Instead of leaving, like he is supposed to, he lies down on Mickey, caging him in and making sure he won’t try to push him off before Ian is done. He has things to say, and Mick isn’t going to listen once Ian is back on his cot.  
“You probably heard about the new transfer, right? For some reason they transferred a serial killer to our unit, and I need you to stay away from him. I know you are still angry and don’t want to listen to me, but please stay away from him. I already met him, he told me he wanted to be here because of you. I don’t know what the fuck is going on and what does he want from you, but don’t talk to him.”  
“You mean Valeska? We met,” Mickey says gruffly.  
“What did he say?”  
“Nothing, he just introduced himself. Now get off me, we’re done.”  
Ian hesitates for a second, his cock is oversensitive, but he doesn’t want to pull out. Being so close to Mickey feels too good, distracts him from thinking about… the guy, Valeska, whoever he really is. Ian goes back to his cot, throwing the used condom to the floor. Mickey is usually responsible for the mess in their cell, so he doesn’t even feel guilty about it. He almost hopes the older boy steps into it when he gets up in the morning.  
He does, if violent swearing that wakes Ian up is anything to go by. Serves him right.  
Good humor doesn’t last long, not when Valeska keeps watching Mickey like a hawk. Ian wants to know more about the guy. He seems to be few years older than either of them, but that’s just a guess. He also isn’t big or scary enough to warrant the respect he gets from other inmates. It hasn’t even been a week yet, and he already has a group of what can only be described as followers. They’re a scary bunch, Ian can admit that, seemingly much scarier than Valeska himself. And yet, he is the one in charge.  
Ian isn’t sure he will be able to protect Mickey when Valeska finally decides to makes his move, so he swallows his pride and talks to Enzo. He quickly realizes the Italian gangbanger will be of no help, because for some reason he likes Mickey better, and he thinks that Mick can upgrade to someone who isn’t a jealous bitch. At least that’s what Ian manages to understand between the bouts of laughter. Fuck Enzo.  
Here is what Ian doesn’t get. If Valeska really is such a big hot shot everyone paints him to be, then why does he bother with Mickey? Sure, Ian is insanely attracted to the grumpy man, but he’s known him for years, has seen every side of him, and that makes a world of difference when it comes to liking Mickey. He is not exactly approachable or conventionally attractive, so why won’t Valeska look away from him for even one minute when they’re in the same room?  
Ryan, who is three cells away from them, is a cute little twink. Irritating as fuck, but his ass is good enough to keep a guy entertained. Or, if Valeska is into scruffy dudes – which he clearly is, Andrew from the infirmary is quite good looking. The point is, there are many options if Valeska wants a bitch so desperately.  
Ian is so focused on Valeska, that he doesn’t realize something else is going on until it’s too late.  
Ian is pretending to be reading a book in their cell, checking the time every five minutes. Mickey still isn’t back from his shower, even though it’s been half an hour already. Soon, the lights will go out, and Mickey will be in trouble if he doesn’t return by then. Ian really hopes he didn’t do something stupid like try to escape without telling him.  
Mickey still isn’t back when the door to their cell closes and locks. Ian tries asking the guard, but the man isn’t very forthcoming.  
“What are you, his keeper? Go to sleep, Gallagher.”  
As if Ian could asleep without Micky’s light snoring to keep him company. He tosses and turns so much that Enzo finally takes pity on him.  
“Mick is in the infirmary,” Ian’s blood freezes in his veins, even though his heart rate skyrockets. “Nothing too serious, but he got stabbed. Some guys know about what he did in Mexico and decided to take out the rat.”  
“How did they learn about it? How do you know?”  
“I was tight with them, wasn’t I? I didn’t fucking know before they told me about it today, but I didn’t want to stab Mick.”  
“Thanks Enzo...”  
“Yeah, now fuck off and go to sleep.”  
Ian doesn’t sleep the whole night. Enzo might have said that the wound isn’t serious, but Ian isn’t sure he can trust someone who once waited two weeks before going to the hospital because he didn’t consider a broken leg to be a big deal.  
The next day brings two things. One is that Ian is allowed to visit Mickey in the infirmary, and while the older man is bruised and wrapped up in bandages, but he isn’t dying. The other is the news about three gang members strangled to death in their cells. It doesn’t take long for everyone to connect the dots. The guys who jumped Mickey are dead, and Valeska looks really smug when Ian catches his eyes.

They don’t talk much when Ian visits Mickey. He tries telling Mick about his day, but that takes about five minutes with the schedule he has, and the older man has even less to talk about. If he even wanted to do that, because he mostly stares at the ceiling. Ian would think he is dead, but he blinks every now and then.  
The break turns out to be far less exhilarating than Ian thought it would be.  
“Well aren’t you two cheerful,” Ian wishes he didn’t recognize the mocking voice that cuts through the silence, but luck has never been on his side.  
“What are you doing here, Valeska?” Ian growls. He tries to hold Mickey’s hand, but the injured man sends him a glare and jerks away.  
“I missed seeing Mickey’s face, _Gallagher_. Hey, Mikhailo.”  
Mickey grunts in acknowledgment and doesn’t seem surprised that Valeska knows his full name. Well Ian is surprised and really fucking annoyed. He didn’t know about _Mikhailo_ until after Mickey got locked up.  
“You look really good for someone who got shanked,” Valeska completely ignores Ian, looking at Mickey like he is something precious. “I took care of it already.”  
“You didn’t have to, I don’t need your help,” there is a bit of a bite in Mickey’s voice, but Valeska continues smiling.  
“Maybe you don’t or maybe you do. The cat is out of the bag now, it might happen again. There’s only one of you, but so many of them.”  
“He has me,” Ian mutters angrily, but Valeska just snorts.  
“You’re as useful as a blind kitten here, everyone knows that. So, Mickey, let’s make a deal. I’ll protect you, but you’ve got to do something for me.”  
“Fuck off, I don’t need protection.”  
“You will change your tune. And when you do, you know where to find me. I can’t wait to have you in my bed.”  
Valeska strolls out of the infirmary like he owns the place, and Ian doesn’t know what outrages him more. The fact that Valeska propositioned Mickey right in front of him, or that Mickey got fucking _flustered_ instead of cussing him out.  
Few minutes later Ian gets thrown out for yelling obscenities at everything around him.  
Valeska is pretty dumb for someone who led the police on a merry chase for so long. If he’s been observing Mickey and paying attention to what he is told then he would know that Mickey doesn’t give a single fuck about his own life. If _Ian_ didn’t know better, he would have almost thought the older man is suicidal, but it’s not exactly that. Mick wants to live, but he is not scared of dying. Threatening to hurt him won’t work, because there is no pain in the world that hasn’t already been inflicted on him by Terry. And that’s worse, it’s always worse when someone who is supposed to care about you turns on you.  
Mickey spends two weeks in the infirmary, and when he comes back Enzo slips him a snickers. He seems happier about it than about the blowjob Ian gives him, which in turn makes Ian wonder if they already drifted apart so much.  
Mickey hasn’t been cleared for work yet, so he stays in their cell a lot. He won’t admit it, but he is still in pain. And he stubbornly doesn’t talk, spending hours staring at inanimate objects, even when Ian is with him. So Ian tries to avoid the cell, playing chess with Jacob or mindlessly watching TV with Pedro in the common room.  
Fifteen more months. Less if he is lucky.  
It’s not that much, he knows it’s not. It might feel like an eternity, but objectively speaking fifteen months is nothing. There are people who are going to spend their whole lives in prison, and they seem to be doing better than Ian. Maybe Valeska was right, maybe he is a bit of a pussy. Or he simply isn’t a hardened criminal, despite the place where he grew up.  
He wants to talk to Mandy. He really wants to call his friend, no matter how selfish it would be. She knows Mickey, she would understand why Ian needed a break. She would reassure him that he is right. She was always softer on him than anyone else, even her own brothers, so she wouldn’t ridicule him for not being able to hold up the ‘real man’ persona for long. It’s what she always liked about him anyway.  
He almost considers asking Mickey for her number, but he quickly realizes how stupid that is. Mickey’s feelings for his family always seemed forced and superficial. He defended Mandy, because she is the only girl in their family, and that’s what his mother taught him when she was still alive. He never cared about any of his brothers. Once they started dating, Mickey only cared about Ian. He does disappear sometimes to make a call, but Ian is pretty sure he calls Svetlana to ask about Yev.  
Ian is uncharacteristically distracted, it’s something he will have to discuss with the psychiatrist when he sees him next week. He doesn’t feel like he is slipping into mania, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t happening. Nowadays, Ian is pretty good at managing is illness, but he’s never had to do it in prison before.  
He is so focused on his emotions that he doesn’t even realize he is been followed until someone grabs him and proceeds to smash his head against the nearest wall, knocking him out almost immediately. But just because he is unconscious doesn’t mean they stop hitting him, which he learns much later, in the infirmary. It must be late when he wakes up, because the lights are out and everyone else is asleep. Ian is in the world of pain, it feels like every bone in his body has been broken and reset, but that can’t be true because the only thing that is bandaged is his head. He doesn’t manage to fall asleep again, the pain keeping him up better than any coffee ever could.  
In the morning, he learns that he’s been jumped by two inmates and was unconscious for two whole days. They tell him their names, but he doesn’t recognize them. He is sure he’s never done anything to anger them, if they even talked.  
Mickey, who isn’t fully healed up himself, visits him after lunch, grim look on his face. For the first time in weeks, he speaks in sentences to Ian, who almost wishes he didn’t. It’s not something he wants to hear.  
“I’m going to take Valeska up on his offer.”  
“No. Absolutely not.”  
“You have no say in it, Ian. It’s my choice.”  
“Is it really? You fucking know that we’ve been jumped because of him. He set it up.”  
“I’m not fucking stupid,” Mickey whispers harshly. “I know what’s going on, but there’s nothing else I can do. Three guys died and no one did anything because Valeska is involved. I don’t know why or how, but I know he is going to kill you if I don’t agree to do it.”  
“Don’t do it, Mickey...” Ian says brokenly. “We will figure something out.”  
“Yeah? Like what? You gonna try to kill him? Spend the rest of your life here if you succeed? You won’t, and I don’t want to fucking lose you, even if you don’t want me anymore.”  
“That’s not true, Mic...”  
“I’m doing it, and that’s final.”  
He leaves then, and Ian isn’t entirely sure their conversation wasn’t just a figment of his imagination. There’s no way Mickey fucking Milkovich said he is going to sleep with someone to protect Ian.  
He insists on being released early, but it’s still few more days before they let him out, unconvinced by his weak attempts at pretending he isn’t hurting all over. He can manage the physical pain, but the thought that his man is fucking someone else while Ian recovers is driving him crazy. It doesn’t help that Mickey doesn’t visit him again.

Their cell is empty and disgusting when Ian is finally allowed to hobble back. Fucking Mickey managed to turn into a complete pigsty in just few days. Ian isn’t sure if he is happy to be back or if he wants to kill him for making everything more difficult than it has to be. Keeping the small space isn’t that hard or time-consuming, but of course Mick is too much of a man to listen to anyone.  
Ian has Mickey’s schedule memorized, so he knows that the older man is currently in the library, working. But it doesn’t stop him from imagining Valeska screwing Mickey in a shower or over a desk while everyone else pretends to be working. He’s been doing that a lot, thinking about Mickey being fucked by the other guy, _liking it_.  
When Mickey finally comes back to the cell in the evening, he seems surprised to see Ian lying on his cot, but all he does is grunt something in acknowledgment. Ian wants to slap him when he doesn’t offer anything else. Most of the time talking to Mickey is like pulling teeth. But Ian can’t see any bruises on his neck or arms, no hickeys either, so maybe Valeska was… maybe not gentle, but at least not violent.  
He already feels like crying, and he hasn’t even heard any details yet.  
“So, uh, did you go to Valeska?” he asks when Mickey finally settles in his bed. It will be easier if he doesn’t have to see the other’s face, he thinks.  
“I did.”  
“And did he… Are you okay?”  
“I’m fine. He didn’t want to fuck yet. Don’t ask me why. We just talked, and...” Mickey suddenly stops, and Ian knows it’s going to hurt, but he still urges him to continue. “He kissed me.”  
“Did you enjoy it?” Ian asks bitterly, fingernails digging into the sensitive flesh of his palms.  
“I… only ever kissed you before, so I don’t know. It felt alright, I just didn’t want to do it.”  
“Listen, Mick, you can still change your mind. We can fight him.”  
“Do you want to get gang-raped, Gallagher?” Mickey’s almost cheerful tone contradicting his grim words. “Because that’s what he planned next. He told me he already knows who’d be more than happy to fuck you, whether you want it or not. Then he will gut you. So unless you want to be a prison cumdump I suggest you shut up about it.”  
“No, I don’t fucking want to be raped, but I also don’t want Valeska to rape you.”  
“He won’t be the first,” Mickey mutters, just loud enough for Ian to hear. “Now let me sleep, I’m fucking exhausted.”  
Ian, despite his agitated state, manages to fall asleep, but the nightmares that plague him prevent him from getting any rest. It doesn’t help that later in the day Valeska invites himself to their table while they eat, shoving Jacob aside and almost making him fall off the bench. He is surprisingly pleasant, but his smile is unnerving. Ian doesn’t understand why Valeska is pretending to be friendly with them, and he hates every second of it. It’s pretty obvious that the older man really likes Mickey though. When Valeska smiles directly at Ian when lunch is over, he is hit with the realization that Valeska has probably been waiting for him to come back from the infirmary so that he can see Mickey after Valeska fucks him. He is trying to establish dominance, as if the entire prison isn’t his bitch already.  
It happens when they least expect it. Ian had a pretty good day, or as good as it gets in prison, and Valeska must have smelled it on him because he sends one of his lackeys to request Mickey’s presence. Mickey stops for a second, looking guiltily in Ian’s direction before he nods to himself, as if he is mentally preparing himself for what’s about to happen, convincing himself it’s the right thing to do. Ian doesn’t try to stop him anymore. He doesn’t think it will work but, more importantly, he doesn’t want to get hurt. Because he knows Mickey wasn’t lying about the things Valeska said. If he could take Mick’s place – he would. But Valeska doesn’t care about him. Ian doesn’t remember the last time a gay guy didn’t want him, and it would be humbling, if their situation wasn’t so screwed up.  
He tries to distract himself by talking to Enzo through the wall, but he ends up snapping at the guy, too wound up to deal with his teasing. So he waits, staring at the door, muscles tense as if he is preparing for a fight. When Mickey finally shuffles into their room his lips are bright red and swollen. Ian’s chest hurts, like his heart is really breaking in half.  
“He didn’t fuck me,” Mick mutters. “He...”  
He doesn’t finish, Ian nods anyway. He knows, he can tell. He’s seen the same look on Mickey before, after he fucked his throat raw.


	3. Chapter 3

“Did you like it?” Ian finally asks after almost an hour of trying and failing to calm down. He knows Mickey isn’t asleep because he can hear him tossing and turning, even though he is trying to stay quiet. That’s another thing, Mick isn’t usually thoughtful enough to be quiet even when Ian is sleeping. “Does he have a good cock, big enough for you? Does it fill you the way mine does?”  
“What the fuck, Ian?” Mickey asks harshly. “Are you seriously asking me if I enjoyed being forced to suck someone off?”  
“I… I know how much you like sucking dick.”  
“I like sucking your dick, you fucking asshole.”  
“Well I’m sorry for having a hard time to accept my boyfriend having sex with someone else!”  
“You gonna make it about you? It’s hard for _you_? Jesus, it’s always about you, even though Valeska didn’t ram his cock down your throat, but sure, you are the one who is hurt. Shut the fuck up and let me sleep, I can’t deal with this bullshit right now. Fucking cunt.”  
Ian wants to argue, but then he realizes that he might have inadvertently assumed Mickey wouldn’t care, that a different cock wouldn’t make a difference. After all, there was a time it didn’t make a difference to Ian. The wave of shame slams into him and he almost sobs with it, but he doesn’t want Mick to hear him. Because the older man is right, it’s not about him, not really. Not this time. He needs to apologize, but he will do it tomorrow, let Mickey catch a break and give him some time to calm down.  
For Ian, it’s another terrible night, and he is starting to wonder if he is ever going to get a decent night’s sleep again. It’s fucking up with his head, and he doesn’t need it – especially with Valeska around.  
He gets off the bed much earlier than usually, and Mickey is still asleep when he crouches next to his bed to look at him. The light from the corridor isn’t enough to let him see the details of Mick’s face, but that’s not an issue – he knows every line and freckle by heart now. He needs to be closer to the older man, so he climbs on the bed and carefully lies on Mickey, covering his much smaller body with his own. In the past, Mickey would wake up already swinging, but now he just mutters something angrily. He feels safe, even though they are in prison, because he knows that Ian is the only other person in their cell.  
Ian peppers Mickey’s face with kisses and the older man doesn’t seem to be able to do much in his half-asleep state. He squirms a bit, but he isn’t actively trying to get away. He is still playing hard to get, but he wants Ian on him. It makes Ian feel like an even bigger douchebag, but it also warms him up inside.  
“I’m so fucking sorry, baby, I’m a fucking idiot. We will get through this together, Valeska won’t break us apart.”  
“It’s you who wanted a break,” Mickey reminds him tiredly.  
“It was a mistake, and I’m sorry. I want to be with you.”  
“Why, because suddenly you have competition?”  
“Because I fucking love you,” Ian whispers furiously, and it seems to stun Mickey into silence for few minutes, which Ian uses to slide his hands into Mick’s prison issue boxers to grab his ass. He wants to be as close as possible to the older man, and that means being _inside_ him. Ian’s cock is already hard, but he doesn’t think they have any condoms left.  
“Don’t tell me that now,” Mickey whispers. “Not when you’re only doing this because you’re afraid Jerome is going to take me away from you.”  
“What the hell Mickey, that’s not why!”  
“You always do that, always say that you love me when you want something from me.”  
Ian might be wrong, since it’s still quite dark, but judging from Mickey’s voice he is close to crying, and that’s not how Ian intended their conversation to go. So he kisses the other man, pressing against his lips almost bruisingly, hoping to convey his feelings this way. Mickey is right, Ian’s confessions have always been poorly timed, so he vows to himself to do better next time. He tries to pull away to give Mick some space, but Mickey pulls him even closer and mutters, “finger me”. It’s a bit dry, since Mickey won’t let him move even an inch away from his ass to lube up his fingers with spit, but the older man doesn’t complain. Quite the opposite, Ian has to swallow his moans with his mouth while they rut against each other, so they won’t wake up their neighbors. Mickey sneaks a hand between their bodies to tug at both of their cocks, his hand too small to properly hold both of them, but it doesn’t make it any less hot. If anything, Ian finds it incredibly arousing how much smaller Mick is from him, even now that he bulked up from all that working out he does when he is bored. Ian still can cover him completely, pick him up and fuck against the wall. Mickey has no choice but to take it, and he loves it, loves every second of it, just like he does now, moaning like a slut while Ian assaults his prostate with two of his fingers, milking it relentlessly.  
Ian fucking loves it too, so much that he blows all over them, surprising even himself. Mickey mumbles something incoherently, clenching around Ian’s fingers before he comes as well, ruining their underwear.

Jerome fucking Valeska.  
Valeska is everywhere, getting on Ian’s nerves like no one has ever done before, but Ian is not going to crumble under pressure. Instead of panicking, he starts to research. He wants to know who is he fighting, even if the things he finds make him nauseous. There aren’t that many newspapers in the library, but there are enough to make him realize that Valeska is the worst kind of criminal. The things he did in Gotham… His lawyer tried to lower the sentence by claiming he was mentally unstable, but it was a lie everyone easily saw through. He was completely sane while he was on a killing spree, gleefully murdering people just to see them suffer. Valeska didn’t even give any reasons for his actions, not that it would change anything, but he didn’t even try to defend himself when given a chance. In the only picture Ian could dig out Valeska was just standing in front of a judge, smirking at him like it was just a joke to him. Like he had no regrets.  
Everything seems to be a joke to him.  
Ian leads Jacob and Pedro to Mickey’s table during dinner, earning himself multiple raised eyebrows. Enzo elbows Jacob in the side when he joins them, and it’s something Ian will have to talk about with Mickey.  
“Weren’t you on a break?” Enzo asks, ignoring the glare Mickey sends him.  
“We were and now we aren’t anymore, not that it’s any of your business,” Ian quips, eyes never leaving Mickey’s face.  
“I beg to differ, I was enjoying peace and quiet while Mick was ignoring you, can’t say I missed your bickering.”  
“Bickering?” Jacob asks shyly, because he hasn’t experienced it yet.  
“It’s not cute, you’ll learn it the hard way,” Enzo sighs like he’s been dealing with them for a decade and not just few months. Ian has to laugh, forgetting about Valeska for a second and letting himself enjoy the temporary peace of mind.  
Mickey is surprisingly cooperative and doesn’t even mention Ian’s sudden decision to be a couple again. In fact, when Ian tries to talk about it in the evening, Mickey just kisses him until he forgets how to speak and is reduced to a moaning mess. But the best thing happens later, when Mickey doesn’t leave his bed. Instead, he squeezes himself between Ian and the wall, hidden from anyone who might want to take a peek inside their cell. But he is still a warm, comforting weight next to Ian, their fingers linked together. It’s fine in the darkness.  
And Ian realizes that doesn’t want to be released without Mickey. He would be lying if he said it has nothing to do with Valeska, but he is not the main reason why Ian is going to throw his parole. They’ve been apart far too long, and it’s his fault. He doesn’t want to do it again, and there is nothing waiting for him outside – he will basically have to start from scratch and… Well, that’s not quite true. It might feel like it sometimes, but if he wants to be objective then Ian has to admit that he has people waiting for him, his family and friends. He won’t be alone when he gets out, and there will be people to lend him a helping hand, which he will definitely need. Mickey is the one who truly has nothing outside; his brothers aren’t the worst, but there isn’t much they can offer him, still under Terry’s thumb. And God knows where Mandy is.  
So Ian is going to stay, but he won’t tell Mickey about it. Knowing the older man, he will be happy at first, but it won’t last. Guilt will start to creep in, and he will tell Ian to leave, ignoring his own feelings.  
Ian won’t tell him about it, and he is not going to leave until he absolutely has to. He made a mistake of leaving before, twice to be exact, and it turned out to be a spectacular failure both times. Two years in prison are better than another heartbreak.

The guard comes in the morning, brings Mickey something that looks like a letter, but he doesn’t have him sign a list. It’s also much too early for it to be proper mail, not to mention the fact that his boyfriend simply doesn’t receive any. Mickey reads the letter with a stony face, while Ian tries to stay calm. There’s something in the way Mickey’s eyebrows furrow that makes his blood run cold.  
“Valeska wants to see me after lunch,” Mick finally says, eyes still on the note, even though there isn’t anything else to see. They both know what it means.  
“W… where?”  
“In his cell. He doesn’t have a cellmate.”  
“Christ,” Ian mutters. He knew it was happening, but it still feels like a slap in the face. He doesn’t want to share Mickey.  
Ian has no idea what he is supposed to do, so he hugs Mickey who, for once, melts into instead of fighting him like he usually would when Ian tries to do something while the lights are on. Perhaps Ian isn’t the only one who is scared.  
He manages to get a whole sleeve of condoms by shaking down some twink, he keeps two for himself and slips the rest into Mick’s pocket before lunch, hoping that Valeska will use them. He wants boyfriend to be safe, no matter what.  
Mickey goes to see Valeska, and Ian waits. He can’t focus on reading a book, so he paces around the cell. For once, Enzo doesn’t bitch about him making noise. Maybe he knows. Maybe everyone knows. Maybe Valeska likes to brag. What if he also likes to share? He hasn’t thought about it before, but it doesn’t seem improbable. Valeska isn’t predictable, and if he decides to pimp Mickey out like a two cent whore they won’t be able to stop him. Fuck. By the time Mick returns, Ian’s arms are covered in welts where he scratched himself, anxiety getting the better of him.  
Mickey doesn’t look any different from when he left, no hickeys or bruises in visible places. Good to know that Valeska has some self-control. He isn’t limping either, but Ian knows firsthand how good Mickey is at hiding that he is hurt when the situation requires it. Mick is holding a brand new, unopened box of condoms and a big bottle of high-end lube. Ian knows the brand, Lloyd used to buy it when they were fucking. It’s the best lube Ian has ever used, but he couldn’t really afford it himself. He always used the cheapest lube they could find with Mick, and when they were younger… Well, it was never his priority, so Mickey did walk funny back then. Teenage Ian was a huge dick in more ways than one.  
Mickey sits down on the bed and beckons Ian to join him. It takes Ian one long step to do that, and they find themselves sitting next to each other in silence with their arms and legs tightly pressed together. They sit like that for a very long time, and the guard ignores them when the lights finally go out. Valeska must have bribed him, and it reminds Ian that they aren’t safe anymore. They can’t even trust the guards.  
In the darkness, Ian finally manages to choke out, “Did he hurt you?”  
“No. He wasn’t brutal or anything, but he did fuck me.”  
“Are… are you okay?”  
“I’m fine. He got me off.”  
“Did he use protection?”  
“Yeah, not the condoms you gave me, said they are rubbish, but he had his own sleeve. Gave me some supplies for us to use.”  
“Oh, I thought it was for… you and him, so you always have some at hand.”  
“No, it’s a gift.”  
“A fucking gift,” Ian lets out a humorless laugh. “He fucks my boyfriend and then gives me a present, how generous of him.”  
“Ian...”  
But Ian doesn’t want to talk. For once in his life, he doesn’t want to talk. He pushes Mickey until the older man understands what he wants and lies on the bed, then he pulls down Mickey’s pants along with the underwear. He is exceptionally gentle when he puts two fingers inside Mickey’s relaxed hole. He’s definitely been fucked. No matter what, Mick is always tight and needs a lot of stretching. Or he would need it, if they weren’t in the hurry almost every time they fucked.  
Ian feels around, rubbing his fingers against Mickey’s walls, looking for something thicker than lube. He doesn’t find it. It makes him feel a little bit better. It’s not much, but he will take it.  
“Can I..” he asks, and Mickey grunts in agreement.  
He takes the condom he got earlier and spits on his hand to make the slide easier, refusing to use Valeska’s stuff. He isn’t dumb, he knows they aren’t going to waste it, spit or fucking mayo can’t substitute lube forever, but it’s too early for that. Ian is feeling a little bit fragile, a little bit broken.  
Ian needs help, there are certain things he can’t work through alone, and he is no longer stupid enough to deny it. He ditches work and almost begs the guards to let him see his psychiatrist. He must look unhinged because they take him to the doctor’s office. For once, luck is on Ian’s side and dr. Lindt finds a free spot for him. Ian isn’t the only prisoner with a mental disorder, far from it, but he is one of the more serious cases. Most mentally ill people don’t get locked up in normal prisons.  
Dr. Lindt doesn’t seem to recognize Valeska’s name when Ian mentions it. He might be very good at keeping a straight face, but Ian doesn’t really care. He needs someone to talk to, someone who understands how difficult it is for him to take control of his own mind and emotions, and to know when they are truly his.  
He feels better after a session, even though dr. Lindt tells him that his current state has nothing to do with his disorder and no drugs will be able to fix the problem, unless it’s Valeska who takes enough of them to… Alright, so the doctor doesn’t say that, but that’s what Ian assumes he would say if he could. The psychiatrist also recommends he takes a break and tries to relax, but they both know it’s not going to happen anytime soon. You can’t take a break from prison.

Valeska fucks his boyfriend every day, and then gives them presents like he is such a nice fucking person. He sends Mickey back with cum stains on his pants, but he also changes Ian’s job allocation to the infirmary, so he no longer smells like detergent all the time. He splits Mick’s lip open with his cock, but he gets Ian a smartphone, so he can call Lip and see his baby. He makes Mickey cry (he asks _why?, how?_ but Mick doesn’t answer), and buys them enough smokes to last them a month and then some. Like they are trading favors.  
Ian doesn’t want any of that. Sure, he is happy that his hands are no longer dry and cracked or that he gets to see his nephew, but they are paying a huge price for that.  
And it annoys Ian that he is the only one complaining, Mick just takes everything Valeska throws at them in silence, ignoring Ian’s questions when he asks for details. But he clings to Ian when they fuck at night, Ian reclaiming the ownership over his body, like it’s hurting him. Their kisses are deep and desperate, and sometimes they taste like salt, but Ian can never tell which one of them is crying. Dr. Lindt told him to persuade Mickey to schedule a visit with a therapist, but Mickey just laughs it off.  
Valeska gifts them with another giant box of condoms, and Ian almost rips it in half.  
“No more. We’re not using them anymore. You are mine!” he growls, blinking away the tears.  
This time, Mickey doesn’t argue. He is almost docile, when Ian arranges him on the cot and fuck him twice as deep as he can before they’re too exhausted to get hard again. Next time, Valeska will find him inside Mickey and not the other way round.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm not dead, just dead tired and overworked. Being an adult sucks :(

There are nail clippings all over the fucking floor, reminding Ian of how much of a pig Mickey truly is. It shouldn’t matter that they’re in prison or that the Milkovich house was a fucking pigsty when Mick was a child. They are supposed to be better than their shitty upbringing. Or, in Mickey’s case, the lack of it, shitty or not. But his boyfriend doesn’t give a single fuck, like he wants to be a dirty thug like he used to be in the past, and to Ian it feels like he is being punished twice. By the law and by his own man.  
He knows that he should probably let it go instead of complaining about it every single day. He knows that they have bigger, much bigger, problems. He knows that he is annoying the hell out of Mickey, and if he is not careful the older man is finally going to snap. But every time he sees the mess Mick makes he wants to rips his hair out and scream.   
“Oh my fucking God! Can you get off my dick? You yap about it every single day!” Mickey growls. Then, he spits on the floor.  
“I wouldn’t have to do that, if you finally learned to pick up after yourself! Look how fucking disgusting our cell is! Even Enzo’s cell looks better!”   
Ian hears a muffled _fuck you_, but ignores it for now.  
“I don’t get it,” Mickey huffs, “why is it so fucking important to you, huh? You can’t even tell me it’s because your home used to be clean ‘cuz that’s a fucking lie!”  
“Because,” Ian finally lets out a full-blown scream, not caring about their neighbors or anyone else who might hear them, “this is the only fucking thing I can control in this shithole, and you’re fucking it up for me! Is it really so much to ask for?! My brain is already a fucking mess Mick, I don’t need my cell to be like that as well!”  
Instead of yelling back, Mickey stares at him thoughtfully before he finally says, “Why didn’t you just tell me that?”  
“Huh?”  
“Why didn’t you tell me it’s about your… your mental health and not you being a pissy bitch? You always nag me about the importance of discussing my feelings, but you can’t fucking tell me the truth when it’s about you?”  
“I didn’t think that...”  
“That what? That I’d care? All I ever do is care, Ian. Should’ve told me instead of screaming at me all the fucking time,” Mickey grunts and, true to his word, starts cleaning up the small space they’re forced to call theirs.   
Ian would laugh at how easy it was, if he didn’t feel like crying. It never occurred to him to just ask, which is rather ridiculous seeing as he, of all people, knows how much Mickey has changed. He was the one who threw it in Mick’s face before trying to beat the shit out of him. He should have known better.  
“I’m sorry,” he quietly apologizes once his boyfriend is done, their cell as spotless as it can be with two grown-up men living in it.  
“It’s alright,” Mickey grunts, grabbing Ian’s neck to pull him down and kiss his forehead. “Just talk to me, man. I can’t read your mind.”  
“You wouldn’t want to,” Ian mumbles, somewhat ashamed of how dark his mind can get, even though Mickey has no way of knowing that.  
The older man just snorts, kissing him again – this time on the cheek, before he goes back to what he was doing when Ian started complaining, which is drawing. He is getting better at it. He might not be next Monet, but he is progressing quickly. Ian asked about it, curious as to why Mickey was so into drawing, and his boyfriend confessed that Terry never allowed him to draw as a child because he considered it too gay. Sometimes, Ian manages to forget the horrors of Mickey’s childhood. Sometimes, he realizes that he doesn’t know the half of it. 

The cell stays clean and so does Mickey. Not that he was dirty before, at least not as dirty as he used to be as a kid, but he would skip showers every now and then. Showering in prison is far from pleasant, and even Ian himself sometimes has to force himself to go there, so he really doesn’t blame his boyfriend for avoiding it. But nowadays no one dares to talk to them without being spoken to first, and Mickey showers every single day. It takes Ian a while to connect the dots and realize that Mick is keeping himself clean for Valeska. He wants to believe that it’s something Valeska demands from his boyfriend, but Mickey’s diligence is slightly worrying.   
Ian can see that whatever Valeska is doing must be working, because Mickey is enjoying himself, at least on the physical level. He is no longer wound up after coming back from Valeska’s cell, quite the opposite. He is pliant and almost soft when Ian fucks into him.  
It’s really fucking hard, especially since his boyfriend refuses to talk about it with him.  
So Ian does what anyone would do in this situation and follows Mickey to Valeska’s cell. He has a vague idea where it is, but he’s never felt the need to go there before.   
There is nothing hesitant or careful in the way Mickey walks towards his destination. Some people greet him, but no one tries to stop him for a chat, and soon enough people start to thin out, making it more difficult for Ian to hide in case his boyfriend looks back. But he doesn’t, not even once. It’s careless, but Ian realizes that he is trusting Valeska to protect him. It feels like a punch in the gut. Gaining Mick’s trust is near impossible, yet this… murderer managed to do that in just few weeks. _Mickey knows how to pick ‘em,_ Ian thinks to himself.   
The last few corridors are completely empty, despite the cells being open. Ian waits for Mickey to disappear from his sight before he follows again. The two men he is going to peep on need to be otherwise occupied by the time he reaches them.  
And occupied they are when he crouches against the wall at the angle that allows him to peek inside the cell. If either of them looks in his direction they should be able to see him, but he has an inkling they will be too busy fucking to look around.  
Mickey is sitting on Valeska’s lap, the lucky fucker has a chair, but Ian doesn’t question things like that anymore, and they’re kissing languidly. It’s not a hurried kiss that’s more tongue than lips, but a deep, intimate kiss. Mick is holding onto Valeska’s broad shoulders, while the older man lets his hands roam all over Mickey’s body, undressing him slowly. It’s not… not what Ian expected, that’s for sure. He thought Valeska would be rough and forceful, but there’s nothing brutal about the way he grips Mickey’s hips and turns him around, telling him to lean against the wall. Nothing violent in the way he kisses Mickey’s back all the way down to his ass. And definitely nothing cruel in the way he parts Mick’s cheeks and licks a long stripe between them, making him gasp. Valeska smirks before he starts eating Mickey out with gusto, making obscene noises while at it, but not as obscene as Mickey’s moans are. They are incredibly loud, echoing through the mostly empty cell. No wonder Valeska wanted the corridors to be empty. Ian doesn’t remember the last time his boyfriend made noises like that for him, they were always surrounded by other people and had to be quiet. He didn’t even know Mickey could moan like that. It’s like something from a good porno.  
“Fuck, Jerome, yes, fuck me with your tongue,” Mickey urges on, and Ian’s cock fattens at how raspy his voice is. Since when does Mickey do the dirty talk? Then again, Ian has never offered to put a tongue up his ass. They’ve never done anything kinky, Mick asked twice – the first time it was the ben wa balls and the second a prostate massager, but Ian turned him down both times. He didn’t see the appeal back then, but the way his boyfriend squirms seems very appealing to him now. But he isn’t the one sitting behind Mickey, mouthing at his rim and fingering him. It’s Valeska, whose cock is straining against the underwear, proving that he is enjoying it as well. It feels like something has been stolen from Ian, even though it’s his fault in the first place. He should have known someone would eventually be willing to give Mickey everything he refused.  
Even from his spot Ian can see that his boyfriend’s thighs are trembling, cock curving towards his belly. He hears Valeska open the condom wrapper and few seconds later the older man stands up, crowding Mickey against the wall as he slicks up himself and pushes inside his partner.  
“My good boy, always so tight for me,” Valeska mutters, grabbing Mickey’s hips to steady him as he starts thrusting. “You love my dick, don’t you baby?”  
“Y...eah. You make me so full, daddy.”  
Ian freezes, torn between retching and palming his cock. In the end, he does neither. He watches as Valeska wraps one hand around Mick’s throat and chokes him, whispering filthy things. And Mickey doesn’t get angry, doesn’t try to fight him. Instead, he whimpers and cries out, swollen cock jerking and dripping precum.  
Enough. Ian had enough.  
He leaves quietly, aroused and hurt, eyes burning with unshed tears. He refuses to cry because of Valeska.  
When Mickey returns to him, like he always does, Ian wants to do everything Valeska did. He wants to slide his tongue inside his boyfriend, lick every inch of him, wants to talk dirty to him and have Mickey talk back. But he can’t, not yet. If he does it now, Mick will know that Ian followed him, and he isn’t ready for another heart to heart. So he fucks him raw instead, trying not to think about it when Mickey’s hole around his dick is far more relaxed than it should be.  
Ian feels like he aged ten years in two weeks. This is how long he manages to wait before he asks Mickey to sit on his face. His boyfriend looks almost freaked out at first, clearly not understanding what Ian is aiming for. But Ian maneuvers Mickey where he wants him, plump ass right on top of his face. It does feel weird. He’s seen it in porn before, but he never thought much about it. Now that there is a solid weight on his face, it’s a little ridiculous. But the sounds Mick makes when Ian flattens his tongue and slides it over his hole makes up for the discomfort.  
His lips feel numb when he finally flips them over, making Mickey face him, and slides inside his boyfriend wet, open ass. Ian puts his hand around Mickey’s throat, and his eyes widen in understanding. Ian doesn’t know how much pressure to apply, so he carefully watches the other man to make sure he isn’t hurting him. He builds up a steady rhythm, not wanting to lose himself in the act and accidentally do something wrong. When Mick is breathing heavily, Ian whispers into his ear: “You know what to call me.”  
Mickey tries to shakes his head, but Ian squeezes his throat harder as a warning. Mickey’s cock drools more precum as he mutters, “Fuck me deeper, daddy. I need your cum in my ass.”  
And Ian does, fucks him like he wants to forget about the world outside, comes so deep inside that he hopes Mick can taste him on his tongue.  
“Are we going to talk about it?” Mickey asks after they cleaned up.  
“Talk about what?”  
“About the fact that you obviously followed me and saw the things Jerome makes me do.”  
“Makes you do? You looked like you enjoyed yourself,” Ian can’t help but scoff.  
“This again? He has a nice dick and knows how to use it, so yeah, I get off.”  
“Why didn’t you tell me about your kinks?”  
“I tried, and you weren’t interested, didn’t want to scare you off again.”  
“I’m sorry. I was a selfish prick.”  
“No, man, if you don’t like it – you don’t like it. I ain’t gonna force you to lick my ass.”  
“I liked it,” Ian admits almost shyly, “I like making you feel good. I’m not sure about the ‘daddy’ thing yet, but I will get used to it.”  
“Hell, no. That’s all Jerome. Rimming? Great. Choking? Even better. Dirty talk? Fucking fantastic. But he is a freak who wants to be called ‘daddy’.”  
“Oh. That’s a relief. Can you promise me one thing?”  
“Hmm?”  
“From now on you’ll tell me when there’s something you want us to do, okay? Come to me… not to Valeska.”  
“Yeah, okay. We won’t be able to do much here, though, maybe some spanking.”  
“Spanking, huh? And what other resources would we need?” Ian purrs.  
“Mhm, rope and stuff. You’d tie me up and fuck me stupid, or I’d tie your hands behind your back, ride you into the bed...”  
“Fuck, Mick. I’m getting hard again.”  
“Come on, tough guy, breed me.”  
It gets Ian going so much that his hands shake. And when later Mickey tells him to call him a slut (_but only in bed_) Ian almost comes on the spot.

When Mickey comes back from his weekly call with Lana, Ian finally feels confident enough to ask, “How is Yevy?”  
“Yevgeny? How should I know?”  
“What do you mean? Didn’t you just talk to Svetlana?”  
Mickey laughs like Ian just said a good joke and shakes his head, “Man, I haven’t talked to her in months. We’re divorced.”  
“I know that, but Yevy is still your son.”  
“I thought she told you everything. She met some old, rich fart, who didn’t just agree to marry her but also adopt Yevgeny. So they did a paternity test, and I’m definitely not Yevgeny’s father. Surprisingly, Terry isn’t either. So no, I’m not keeping in touch with them.”  
“But you loved him, so even if he is not your son by blood...”  
“No, Ian,” Mickey interrupts him rather harshly. “_You_ and Mandy always pressured me into loving him, acting like a father, taking care of him. I did it because I loved you, not because I wanted to be a father to a kid who is a… Anyway, you were the one who loved the kid, not me. Or, well, I thought you did, but you apparently stopped visiting after you left me, so what do I know.”  
“I did love him,” Ian whispers, but he knows Mick doesn’t believe him. Why would he? He is right, Ian stopped caring after he dumped the older man. And fuck if he isn’t right about Ian pressuring him to care for Yevy. He takes a shaky breath and, instead of reopening old wounds, he asks a different question. “Who are you calling then? I thought it’s Lana, but...”  
“Mandy, who else?”  
“You’re keeping in touch with her? You know where she is?!”  
“’Course I do, she’s my sister. Being in a real gang is good for your wallet, man. I had more than enough money, so I’d keep some and send her the rest, so she didn’t have to whore herself. I even have savings now. Not a lot, but more than I ever had before. So I won’t be completely broke when I get out.”  
Despite the questionable source of his money, Mickey looks proud of himself. Ian isn’t going to ruin it for him, so he smiles back and asks if he can have Mandy’s number. His boyfriend agrees without any hesitation, but he isn’t very forthcoming when Ian asks for more details about his friend.  
Instead of calling his family, Ian decides to ring Mandy this week. He doubts they will care or even notice. It seems that they don’t think about him once they can’t see him every day, too busy with their own lives. Call it a middle child syndrome, but it always seemed to be that way. Maybe Fiona cared more when he was younger and she was different, but that has passed. Nowadays, they just want him to stay sane enough, so that he doesn’t steal any more babies and doesn’t fuck his way through Chicago again.  
Mandy agrees to take his call, most probably thinking he is Mickey, even though her brother already had his call. She greets him warmly, in a way he never heard Mandy speak to Mickey before. Their relationship must have changed along the way, and Ian wasn’t there to witness it.   
“Hey, Mands,” he says, and he can almost feel the change in his friend.  
“Ian?!” she asks sharply.  
“Mick gave me your number, I hope it’s okay.”  
“As okay as you breaking up with Mick after he confessed.”  
“Oh. I… I get it, sorry, I’ll...”  
“No, fuck, Ian, don’t hang up. Shit, sorry, I’m angry at you, but I missed you.”  
Ian smiles into the receiver and mumbles, “Yeah, I’m angry at myself too. But I miss you even more.”  
Mandy spends most of their call on verbally ripping him a new one, but it feels good to hear her voice. Even when she is telling him how disappointed she is in him. Because he knows she will forgive him soon enough, she could never stay mad at him long. Ian calls her again next week, starved for attention of someone who isn’t obliged by blood to love him.  
They talk about her new life, which is far from glamorous, but she isn’t a whore and for once she doesn’t have a boyfriend who treats her like shit, so that’s good enough. Ian tells her about Lip’s kid, but she doesn’t seem too shaken up.  
“Good for him, but I’m surprised he wants kids after dealing with Carl, Debbie and even Liam,” she quips before switching topics to her new job. She was always a hard worker. People used to say that about Ian, but that’s because he was always so tall and bright, easy to notice. Mandy, not so much, people only saw what they wanted to see, a Milkovich bitch. She started to believe it after a while, but she seems to be standing tall now. Mickey helped, even though he wasn’t close, he still helped, Mandy told him that because his boyfriend would never admit to doing something good. Even if it’s for his family.   
And maybe Mick wouldn’t tell him about it because of the things Ian said to him in the past. To Ian, it feels like the altercation at the dugouts has been ages ago, but he knows it’s still fresh in Mickey’s mind. Like every vile thing Ian has told him before they broke up, and he was struggling to accept his illness. Mickey is only human, and the bad things stick to him much more than any praise ever could.  
So when Ian is done with his call, he goes back to Mickey and holds him tight, even if his man tries to throw him off at first. Ian knows that Mickey likes his hugs, he just doesn’t want to admit it yet. Maybe sometime in the future, when they’re both free again.


	5. Chapter 5

Because Ian’s life is a huge joke, things tome to a head because of education. One day he comes back from the infirmary earlier than usually and catches Mickey reading something. ‘Catches’ is the best word for what happens because when Mickey finally hears Ian, he quickly puts the book down and slides it under his pillow. In the past few months Ian got used to seeing Mickey read, so that wouldn’t be surprising at all. But he can’t imagine what would make his boyfriend act like a spooked rabbit, and he quickly becomes suspicious.  
He pretends that he didn’t see anything, greeting Mickey with a kiss and starts chatting about work, complaining about the patients who test him every day. It’s true, he is annoyed by the number of people who get injured on purpose, so that they can delay the release date, but he is mostly waiting for Mickey to crack and tell him what he was doing while Ian was at work. But his boyfriend is much better at lying to him than Ian has thought, because Mickey doesn’t even look nervous anymore.  
In the evening, when Mick goes to meet Valeska, Ian goes through everything they own (because there’s no _him and Mickey_ anymore, it’s _them_, at least in his mind), and at first he doesn’t find anything out of ordinary. Which is even more suspicious, since he is pretty sure Mickey didn’t stuff anything down his pants before going to meet Valeska, and there are only so many hiding spots in their tiny cell. So he goes through their books again, this time opening them to check if the inside corresponds with the outside.  
Bingo.  
Inside of ‘Fahrenheit 451’ he finds a GED Study Guide, and it’s not at all what he expected. It should be a relief, but it feels like a slap in the face instead. Why would Mickey hide it from him? Ian promises to himself that he is going to stay calm, but he is already feeling the anger building up when Mickey returns from Valeska’s with a slight limp.  
“Do you want to get a GED?” he asks conversationally, while Mickey undresses. He isn’t even trying to be subtle.  
“Nah, man, the fuck would I do with it?”  
This little fuck… outright lying to him. Ian holds up the book and says, “Try again.”  
“You snooped through my things?”  
“Really, Mick? Really? Why are you even hiding this from me? There’s nothing wrong with wanting to get a GED, I just don’t understand the sudden change of heart. You hated school.”  
“Jerome thought it would be a good idea,” Mickey mumbles quietly.  
“Excuse me?!” Ian stands up, getting in Mickey’s face. “Valeska told you to get a fucking GED, so you’re doing it? Are you his fucking lap dog now? Why am I even asking, you’ve been riding him like a bitch for a while now.”  
“You gonna throw it in my face now? Fuck you, Gallagher! You said it yourself, nothing wrong with getting it, Jerome has been trying to convince me to get it for a while now, and I thought I could give it a shot. So that, you know, I can get a proper fucking job once we’re out of this shitole!”  
“Oh, so when _Jerome_ tells you something you’re willing to listen, but when I tell you to do something about your future, you just fucking argue or straight up ignore me!”  
“Fuck off, man, when have you ever told me to get a GED? You can’t be fucking mad about something you didn’t even try to do!”  
“Fuck you, Mick, you wouldn’t listen anyway.”  
“Yeah, because you’d force me to get it. At least Jerome made it seem like it’s my choice.”  
It gives Ian a stop because, frankly speaking, he can’t argue with that. He might have made an offhand comment once or twice before, but he never really cared about it, assuming that Mickey would never be interested in getting any education. It makes him so fucking mad that Valeska apparently saw that Mickey is ready, and he didn’t.  
It’s not Mickey’s fault, but Ian is so bitter that he doesn’t touch his boyfriend that night. He doesn’t even respond when Mickey whispers ‘goodnight’ to him.

Ian opens the box of condoms that Valeska gave them, but they never used it, taking out one. It should be enough. He is about to make a monumental mistake, and he knows it, but Mickey isn’t around to stop him. He isn’t around because he is with Valeska, probably being split open on his dick. Ian knows he is making a mistake, but the pain he is experiencing is too much for him to handle, he doesn’t know how to deal with it anymore. He is going to hurt Mickey, but he is tired of, seemingly, being the only one in constant pain. Maybe he deserves it, maybe the shit he’s done in the past is finally catching up to him in the form of Jerome Valeska, but it’s too much.  
He chooses Ryan, because he knows the guy is attracted to him, and he doesn’t want to force himself on anyone. Another reason being that Ryan is a twink, and twinks don’t form attachments, at least not in prison. And Ryan isn’t his type, not at all, too slim and frail, breakable. But his kisses are good enough, and he turns around willingly when Ian realizes he can’t do it, if he has to stare at this man’s face. He takes a deep breath, accidentally inhaling Ryan’s scent, and it his him how wrong it is.  
He is going to hurt Mickey again.  
He doesn’t want Ryan, his cock is still limp, even though he’s been palming it for the past five minutes. He doesn’t want it, he doesn’t want Mickey to cry because of him again.  
“I’m sorry, I can’t,” he murmurs before turning around and almost running back to his cell.  
Mickey is already there, sitting on his bunk. Ian tries to smile, but it quickly disappears when he notices that his boyfriend is holding an open box of condoms.  
“Did you like it?” Mickey asks, throwing Ian’s words back at him.  
“No, no, Mick, I didn’t do it.”  
“But you tried.”  
“Let me explain,” Ian pleads, but Mickey is already standing up, ready to leave the cell. Ian grabs him by the arm, but the older man pushes him away with enough force to send him stumbling back, and leaves.  
When he doesn’t return two hours later, Ian knows that he went to Valeska. He is the only one with enough power to make the guards overlook the fact that Mickey doesn’t return at all that night. He returns the next day, completely ignoring Ian’s attempts at conversation.  
Ian knows something is really wrong when he wakes up after another day of silent treatment from Mickey, and he immediately feels uneasy. He doesn’t hear the familiar grunts coming from the bottom bunk, the cell is far too quiet and still, yet it doesn’t seem like he is alone. He swings his legs over the cot, but before he can touch the bed ladder someone grabs him and pulls him down hard, making sure he hits the floor with enough force to stun him for a minute.  
Valeska stares at him from Mickey’s bunk, but Mickey isn’t there. The door is still locked. Someone must have let them switch places. Ian can’t help but wonder if Mick has finally had enough of him.  
“You know what’s funny?” Valeska says with a wide smile that Ian hates. Nothing good ever comes out of this smile, nothing pleasant or nice. At least not for Ian.  
“What?” he growls, knowing that the other man won’t leave until he gets what he wants.  
“Everyone seems to believe you’re such a good guy, a golden retriever in a human body. But I can see right through you, I know how dark, ugly and twisted you are inside. And it has nothing to do with your illness. I almost see myself in you, but I at least don’t pretend to be good.”  
“No? What about Mickey then, aren’t you sweet to him? Spoiling him like you love him?”  
“Ah, Mikhailo does have a special place in my heart. Unlike you, I’d kill for him. Unlike you, I’d stay for him. If he wanted me to.”  
“But he doesn’t. He wants me,” Ian says with the confidence he doesn’t feel anymore. Maybe Mickey still loves him, but maybe he finally got tired of trying.  
“He does love you, that silly boy. It’s a pity, really, I’d give him Gotham if he asked. But I respect his choice. Now, you upset Mikhailo greatly. Ryan has been taken care of already, but you...”  
“You killed Ryan?!” Ian might not care for the guy, but he doesn’t want people dying because of his mistakes. He doesn’t think he could live with it.  
“No, I didn’t kill your little boy toy, but I had him moved somewhere else. How sweet of you to care so much about your...”  
“I don’t fucking care about Ryan, but I don’t want people dying unnecessarily!”  
“Don’t interrupt me,” Valeska growls and stands up, hovering over Ian like a huge, frightening bird of prey. “I’ve got only one thing to say to you, and I will say it once only. You hurt Mickey again, you won’t ever see your family or the world outside. Got it, you insipid bitch?”  
Ian nods and nods, until Valeska is satisfied, while he is left feeling utterly humiliated.  
But Mickey returns to him in the evening, and that’s the most important thing at the moment.

“I thought you weren’t coming back,” Ian quietly admits after the door is locked, and Mickey has no choice but to listen to him. “I thought you’d ask Valeska to reassign you.”  
“Don’t pretend that’s even a possibility,” Mickey practically growls. “You know damn well that I won’t ever leave you. That’s the whole fucking problem, I love you too much to ever leave. You can slap me around all you want, fuck around on me, and I will still wait for you to come back. That’s how pathetic I am.”  
And Ian didn’t know that, not at all. It never really crossed his mind that for Mickey, the only two choices he has are to either love Ian indefinitely or never love again. The realization leaves a bittersweet taste in his mouth, he never wanted to have a hold like that on Mickey. He just wanted be loved by someone who wasn’t obliged to love him, someone who wasn’t his family. It always seemed surreal, impossible, so when it finally happened – he took and took without any respect for Mick’s well-being. But he can’t pretend that it doesn’t make him warm all over either.  
“I… I was the one who fucked up your life, wasn’t I, Mickey?”  
He half-expects Mickey to go easy on him, deny it like he would in the past, so it hurts when the older man nods sharply. “Yeah, yeah you did in some ways. But you also made it better, things are never meant to be rainbows and sunshine for people like me. But I’m not going to deny that the moments I spent with you are some of the happiest of my life.”  
Which, really, says more about Mickey’s life than about their relationship, because Ian could probably count the good moments they shared on one hand, and the bad ones… He would run out of space pretty quickly. So he doesn’t count, because he is a coward.  
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say, I thought I was doing the right thing.”  
“Yeah, well it’s pretty fucking amusing that you didn’t want to go with me ‘cuz you had your life together, and look at you now. You’re in fucking prison.”  
“It’s funny that I ruined both of our lives?”  
“No, it’s funny that I used to believe I was the one bringing you down, but it turns out that you’re perfectly capable of fucking up on your own. And don’t be so dramatic, you didn’t ruin shit. You’ll get your shit together after you’re released, get a good job, find a nice boyfriend and leave all that crap behind. Just stick to your fucking meds.”  
“What the fuck, Mick?! I’m not leaving you again.”  
“You’re saying it now, but we will see what happens once you smell freedom again.”  
“I threw my parole to stay here,” Ian almost shouts. “I didn’t want to leave you!”  
“Jerome…”  
“Sure, Valeska played a part in it, but I did it because I didn’t want you to be alone! I can spend full two years here if it means being with you.”  
“Shit, Ian. Y...you shouldn’t have. You could be with your family now,” Mickey’s voice is shaking slightly, and he no longer sounds mad.  
“You are my family too.”  
“If I’m your family then you need to stop hurting me before you break me again.”  
“I didn’t sleep with him.”  
“I know, but you wanted to. Because you wanted to punish me, and for fucking what? Being forced to sleep with Jerome?”  
“For liking him,” Ian finally admits, overtaken by shame. “I know you like him. I don’t understand why, but you do.”  
“He is good to me,” Mickey shrugs. “I know he isn’t a good guy, but he is good to me. Buys me stuff. Protects us. He is pretty fucking funny when he drops the crazy act. I’m not scared of what he’s done to other people, maybe Terry isn’t a mass murderer, but you can’t even imagine half of the stuff he did in the past, of what I saw. You think you understand, but you really don’t, because you never got to experience it. I’m happy you didn’t, but you won’t ever know why I’d take Jerome over Terry any time.”  
“He forced himself on you.”  
“Yeah, but… Recently I told him that... everything is too much on my body. There is only so much fucking my asshole can take, you know? So he backed off a bit. Sure, we still do other stuff, blowjobs, handjobs, all that, but he only fucks me when I’m up for it.”  
At first, Ian wants to ask why Mickey didn’t tell him about it. He is the boyfriend here, he is the one who should care. But then it dawns on him that Mickey _wants to have sex with him_ and not with Valeska. And it’s such a huge relief that he kneels in front of his boyfriend, who is sitting on the bed, takes his face between his hands and starts kissing him all over it with as much tenderness as he can without freaking his boyfriend out. Mickey’s growth is immense, but there are still things he doesn’t like to do. And Ian is slowly learning to respect the boundaries, especially now that he realizes how much work he has to put into making sure he doesn’t hurt Mickey again.


	6. Interlude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [M0therNature](https://archiveofourown.org/users/M0therNature) inspired me to write Mickey's POV about Jerome. And well, here it is.

To say Mickey isn’t hurt would be a lie, but it would be an even bigger one to say he didn’t expect it to happen. He loves Ian, he will always love Ian, but does he trust him? No, he would be stupid to do that.  
He isn’t surprised when Ian wants to fuck again either. After all, Mickey can belong to one man and one man only.

Valeska’s interest blindsides him. He isn’t used to being desired, that was always Ian’s specialty. And now someone wants him for who he is, but it’s too much, too selfish. Mickey doesn’t appreciate being blackmailed, even less so when Ian gets involved. Despite telling Ian that they have to listen to Valeska, Mickey plans on killing the older man, even if he will have to break his neck with his own thighs.  
But it quickly becomes obvious that Valeska isn’t a simple thug Mickey is used to dealing with. Even Terry doesn’t come close to him – Mickey's father is all about brutal violence and very little planning, he just knows the right people and who to pay off when things go south. Valeska is cunning and his reach is far bigger than Mickey expected.  
The first time they meet, two inmates he doesn’t recognize escort him to Valeska’s cell, and on the walk there Mickey realizes that the murderer somehow managed to clear out the whole block, ensuring complete privacy. If Mickey didn’t know Valeska wants to fuck him, he would have thought he is about to be killed.  
Valeska is nice to him, even when he threatens him subtly by showing him the gun he somehow managed to smuggle inside (or, more probably, that has been given to him by one of the guards) or when he less subtly threatens to send people after Ian. His voice is smooth and soothing when he recounts the terror he inflicted on Gotham, and Mickey heard something about it before, but he was never truly interested in things happening outside of Chicago, so most of it is new and gory. Mickey isn’t exactly scared, but he is unsettled and angry that he will have to sleep with this man if he wants to keep Ian safe.  
His anger dissipates slightly when Valeska offers him a deal.  
Valeska starts with kissing. And Mickey feels like the last bits of control have been stolen from him. He tries to stop the other man, turning his head away and reaching for Valeska’s fly to distract him, but the older man just tuts at him like he is a child, grabs him by the jaw and forces his lips on Mickey’s.  
It shouldn’t be a big deal, it’s just a kiss.  
But Mickey has never really kissed anyone but Ian. He’s had plenty of sex, probably more than Ian thinks he did, but he only ever kissed one man. Mickey isn’t a romantic at heart, but there are things he considers too intimate to do with random people, kissing being one of them. And now Valeska stole that from him.  
The worst part is that he doesn’t hate kissing Valeska, who definitely knows what he is doing, leaving him flushed and breathless. He ends up calling Mickey a ‘good boy’, and Mickey is ashamed of how hot he suddenly feels.  
Ian takes it harder than Mickey expected. On one hand it’s weird, because Mickey knows his boyfriend kissed many guys. But on the other, Ian is a greedy, selfish bastard who wants Micky to be only his, so maybe it shouldn’t be surprising.  
The blowjob is easier. Not easy, just easier. Yeah, Valeska makes him choke on a dick and comes down his throat, but Mickey sucked plenty of dick in Mexico. He tries to think about Ian, but Valeska smells and tastes completely different, and Mickey is very much aware that it’s not his boyfriend’s dick he is sucking dry.  
Valeska wants to talk after they’re done, and it confuses Mickey further. He can understand the attraction, people can like the weirdest things, but Valeska seems curious about him as a person, and Mickey just doesn’t get it. Maybe the older man is just trying to butter him up before shoving his dick up Mickey’s ass, but his interest seems genuine. And as cruel as Valeska might be to other people, he is nice to him. He speaks differently when they are alone, doesn’t seem so crazy and unhinged as he is around other prisoners.  
Most of the time, Valeska is nicer to him than Ian.  
It’s fucked up to compare the two, but Ian managed to hurt him even in prison, and aside from the whole consent thing, Valeska is good to Mickey. And it’s not like Mickey hasn’t been fucked against his will before, at least this time his father isn’t involved.  
“You are my baby boy,” Valeska murmurs when Mickey asks him _why_, pressing kisses to his face. In any other context, with anyone else, it wouldn’t work. It would make Mickey angry. He is no one’s _baby boy_, he doesn’t get off on calling men _daddy_, he isn’t a pathetic twink. And yet he melts into Valeska’s arms when the other man praises him softly.

Ian fucks him roughly after he has sex with Valeska for the first time. Mickey knows he doesn’t mean to, but Ian is so lost in his own emotions that he forgets that Mickey is already slightly sore from the other man and goes too hard. Mickey doesn’t blame him. Instead, he blames himself for liking the way Valeska licked him open and jerked him off, making him cum all over their stomachs.  
Mickey would never call his sex life with Ian boring, but they never try anything new. In the end, an orgasm is an orgasm, so he never complains and leaves some of the stuff he likes for his solo sessions (or he used to in the past, when they were outside and still dating), but getting to explore his kinks is exhilarating. Even if he doesn’t get to do it with the man he loves. Valeska is obviously experienced, and except for the daddy thing, he never forces Mickey to do something again if he doesn’t like it the first time.  
He can’t talk about it with Ian, that would probably kill his boyfriend, so he opens up to Mandy instead. He doesn’t give her any details, that would be gross, but he admits to liking having sex with Valeska. Mandy is weirdly understanding for someone who used to think that the sun shines out of Ian’s ass. Maybe it’s the money Mickey has sent her, or maybe she finally realized that her best friend isn’t exactly the angel she had him for. Being able to talk about it with someone else is freeing. For the longest time Ian was the only person who cared about his thoughts, even when he wasn’t ready to voice them yet, and Mickey was incredibly lonely after they broke up. It took him few months to reach out to Mandy, and it ended up being one of the best decisions he’s ever made. Her bitching and moaning about life kept him sane while he was in Mexico. Being in a cartel wasn’t really for him, and he learned it the hard way.  
Ian follows him. Of course he fucking follows him. Mickey knew it would happen, because Ian is a nosy idiot who likes to suffer. He just thought Valeska’s thugs would stop him.  
Maybe Valeska wanted Ian to see.  
Whatever it is, Ian follows him and then decides to reenact what he saw. He is good with his tongue, and his large hand is just the right size to hold his throat and make him work for every breath. It’s good, so good that it gets Mickey thinking.  
Ian has done it before, maybe not all of it, but some. Rimming, probably. He’s done it for someone else. He wouldn’t do it for Mickey, but he licked random dude’s asshole. Or maybe it was one of his boyfriends.  
Mickey doesn’t want to think about it, but how can he not? How can he fucking not?

Somewhere along the way Valeska becomes Jerome.

Mickey doesn’t mean to start liking him as a person. He wishes he could pretend Jerome is just a sex doll, but it’s difficult when the older man just won’t shut up. That’s one of the two things he has in common with Ian, the other being Mickey himself.  
Sometimes, Jerome says fucked up things. They will be trying to catch their breaths after a hard fuck, and Jerome will whisper, “Would you be able to love me, if Ian wasn’t there? If I killed him?”  
It’s wrong, so wrong, but Mickey knows that it’s Jerome trying to be romantic, so he just shakes his head, because no, no matter how nice Jerome is to him, he could never forgive him for murdering Ian.  
And sometimes, Jerome says things that get Mickey thinking.  
“What are you going to do when you’re free?”  
“Ah, shit, dunno, probably drugs.”  
“No, Mikhailo, I’m asking about your life. What are your plans?”  
“Still drugs?” this time, he hesitates. People don’t ask him that often. They take one look at him, and they know he has no future.  
“You want to be a criminal still?” Jerome sounds disappointed, and it makes Mickey think he really fucked up if a _murderer_ is disappointed in him.  
“What else could I do?”  
“Oh, Mickey. Answer me this. Have you ever been rich?”  
“Fuck, no. I wish.”  
“Then what’s the point in being a criminal if you don’t really profit from it? Do you want to spend the rest of your life in prison or get shot by some lowlife and leave nothing behind? If you want to be a criminal, you should go big. Die rich. But you don’t want to be a criminal. That’s what your father wanted, because he is too stupid to know better. Think about him, what has he achieved?”  
“Not much,” Mickey begrudgingly admits.  
“Exactly. You can do better. If you get a job you won’t have to worry about leaving people behind again.”  
“I don’t even have a GED, man.”  
“So get it. Does Ian have a GED?”  
“Of course he does.”  
“Then it’s clearly not that difficult. I’m not sure what makes you think he is smarter than you, but you’re wrong, baby boy.”  
And so Mickey borrows a GED Guide Book from the library. As he flips through it, he realizes that it doesn’t seem as difficult as he thought it would be. That doesn’t mean he is going to ace it, or even pass the exam, but at least it doesn’t discourage him from trying.  
He doesn’t really know why he decides to hide it from Ian. Some part of him is worried his boyfriend is going to laugh at him, but he also wants to surprise Ian, show him that he can do better. That he is trying to make their future better.

It blows up in his face, like every good thing he’s ever done.  
Ian tries to fuck someone to get back at him, so Mickey does the first thing he can think of and goes to Jerome. Because he turned into a little bitch who needs someone else to handle his problems. Because he knows someone is willing to do this for him. And because he is so fucking tired of fighting.  
“Just… don’t kill him,” he mutters, face pressed against Jerome’s neck.  
“Ian? Or the fuckboy?”  
Mickey thinks about it for a long minute. “Neither. No one deserves to die because of Ian’s dick.”  
“The things I do for you,” Jerome groans, like it’s such a big chore _not to_ murder someone. 

Jerome is a scary motherfucker with no regard for human life. Dangerous. But he is more than that – a good lover and a friend. And maybe Mickey would be better off loving him. He knows Jerome can’t be contained and will leave Chicago sooner or later, leaving a trail of dead bodies behind. Mickey has never been to Gotham, but he doesn’t really feel attached to places, just people, so he could probably learn to like it. But no matter how good Jerome is to him, Mickey could never learn to love another man after Ian.


	7. Chapter 7

In five months Ian will be released. It seems like not enough time.  
Ian wonders if he should stab someone to stay in prison longer, but he has no idea how long they will keep Mickey. He does know that his boyfriend wouldn’t be happy with him if he did that, so all he can do is worry about Mickey being left alone with Valeska. It doesn’t matter that Enzo is behind the wall, or that Mickey has his own acquaintances. None of this matters in the face of sheer force that’s Jerome Valeska.  
“Maybe we should gang up on Valeska and shank him,” he mutters into Mickey’s hair. They are cuddling on Mickey’s bed, although the older man would never admit to that. “We can take him on together.”  
But Mickey starts to shake his head even before Ian is done talking, “We can’t do that. There’s something he is going to do for me… and for you. But I can’t talk about it.”  
“But wouldn’t it be amazing if it was just the two of us again, hmm?” he is laying it on thick, hands roaming over Mick’s strong body and hips grinding against his plump ass, slotting his half hard dick between the cheeks.  
“It would,” Mickey quietly admits. “But we can’t. You have to trust me.”  
“It’s not you I don’t trust,” Ian insists, because it’s true. Mickey is the only constant in his life. The older man just grunts and urges him to hug him tighter. Ian takes it as a sign he also wants some more action, so he sneaks one hand down Mick’s boxers to palm his cock nice and slow. He doesn’t need to hurry up, they are done for the day and tomorrow is their day off.  
“How are you feeling?” Mickey suddenly asks, surprising Ian. It’s been a while since he asked that, worried that Ian will lash out again.  
His first instinct is to lie and say everything is fine, but he’s lied a lot in the past and nothing good ever came out of it. So instead, he says, “I’m worried. Tired of Valeska. Happy that you’re with me.”  
“More tired or more happy?” Mickey’s voice is small this time, so Ian squeezes him with the hand that isn’t in his boyfriend’s underwear.  
“Happy, always happy,” he presses small kisses against the side of Mickey’s face and neck, gently rolling his hips at the same time. “I love you so much, baby.”  
Instead of complaining about the pet name, Mickey brings their lips together for a kiss, but it’s Ian who deepens it, sliding his right hand to Mick’s ass at the same time. His boyfriend’s hole is still relaxed from earlier, so two of his fingers easily slip inside and quickly find Mickey’s prostate.  
“Fuck me,” his boyfriend begs, angling his hips even more towards Ian, but that’s not the plan. Ian keeps rubbing and petting the slightly swollen gland, mouth attached to Mickey’s neck. He knows he is leaving a bruise, he _wants_ to leave one. And Mickey is too busy writhing on his fingers to care. He is good at that, at taking pleasure. One day, when they are free, Ian is going to get him a suction cup dildo, watch him ride it. And then, after Mickey is spent, Ian is going to fuck his sloppy wet hole again.  
His dick is hard, but he wants Mickey to come on his fingers, wants to give him so much pleasure that his boyfriend forgets about the man waiting for him in another cell. With the hand that isn’t busy assaulting Mickey’s prostate, Ian runs his nails over his nipple and then rolls it between his fingers until it’s puffy. It’s one of those things Mick would never admit to, but he loves to have his nipples played with, and if Ian could he would be sucking on them.  
“Give me more fingers, dumbass,” the older man growls, earning himself a warning bite. It doesn’t mean Ian doesn’t listen to him, quite the opposite, he adds the third finger almost immediately. He just likes biting and sucking Mickey’s pale skin.  
“My little slut,” he croons, twisting his fingers before he picks up the pace, hand cramping with how hard he is fucking Mickey’s hole.  
“Fuck, just like that, almost there!” Mickey whisper-shouts and touches his own cock, jerking off at the same pace as Ian is fucking him. He almost breaks Ian’s fingers when he squeezes around them, and Ian covers his lips and nose last minute to stop the scream that’s been building up in his throat. Mickey can’t breathe properly, and he comes so hard he blacks out.  
Ian knows he should probably stop, but he just pulls his fingers out and takes the other hand off Mickey’s face. He shoves his throbbing dick between Mick’s sweaty, lube-covered thighs and fucks with enough force to make them both shake. It takes two, three thrusts before he is cumming, adding to the mess. Mickey’s body is absolutely filthy, sticky with perspiration, lube, spit and semen. He is Ian’s perfect nasty bitch boy. Fuck, what?  
Ian is glad that he it too tired to talk, and Mickey is still out of it because he is pretty sure he deserves ass-whooping for his thoughts.

When Mickey doesn’t return to the cell, Ian worries that he’s done something to piss his man off. He spends the better part of the night analyzing his own actions, trying to pinpoint the moment he screwed up, but he draws a blank. He’s been on his best behavior, even though he has been secretly thinking about shanking Valeska. Mickey told him to be patient, but Ian is quite sure his boyfriend wouldn’t complain if Ian somehow managed to kill Valeska without raising any suspicions. He doesn’t have a plan yet, but there has to be something. No one is untouchable. But Ian has to admit that he doesn’t quite have the resources necessary to take down someone like Valeska. Jacob and Pedro are almost useless, both too worried about time being added to their sentences, and Enzo – who is the only other choice he has, would probably spill everything to Mickey before Ian put his plan into action.  
He feels like shit in the morning, at least he doesn’t have to work today.  
The guards refuse to tell him anything about Mickey’s whereabouts. By lunch, he is desperate enough that he looks for Valeska, but he also is nowhere to be found. Ian can’t decide if it’s a good sign or not.  
His medication helps him fall asleep in the evening, but he is harshly woken up few hours later when someone gags him with something soft and puts a bag over his head. He tries to struggle, but there are at least three people, who carry him out of the cell and down the stairs. Blindfolded, Ian has no idea where they are taking him, and his heart pumps blood so fast he can’t hear properly.  
It’s the smell that clues him in. Ian spends enough time in the infirmary to recognize the smell even before they reach their destination. Bright lights assault his eyes when the bag is ripped off his head, and he spits out whatever has been shoved into his mouth. It looks like a sock, gross.  
He knows he is in the infirmary, but the place doesn’t look the way it should. The beds have been moved to the side, and the floor is covered with plastic. The room is crowded with people, but all he can see is Mickey half-sitting in one of the beds. He is sickly pale and in a hospital gown. No one tries to stop Ian when he crosses the room to get to his man.  
“What happened to you?”  
“He got back-stabbed, quite literally,” it’s Valeska who answers, Ian didn’t even notice him. “And in a second, we are going to find out who did it. Don’t worry, Gallagher, he will pull through.”  
Ian presses a chaste kiss against Mickey’s chapped lips, and the older man smiles at him reassuringly. When he finally gets a good look at people around them, he realizes that most of them are Valeska’s lackeys, and they are surrounding a group of Mexicans. Ian recognizes some of them, but they never caused him any trouble. Until one of them decided to stab Mickey. Again.  
“Now that we are all here,” Valeska speaks again, “let’s finally get to the point. Some of you already know why we are here. Two of you, to be exact. Yesterday, someone decided to go against my order and attacked my good friend Mickey. I know there’s two of you, even though you attacked him from behind, because you were stupid enough to talk to each other in Spanish. If it was up to me only, I’d just kill every Mexican in this place. It would be faster. But Mickey said he would be upset if I went on a killing spree.”  
Ian looks at his boyfriend, who might have never killed anyone, but never seemed too broken up about people dying. The almost shy look on Mickey’s face tells him everything he needs to know – he didn’t do it for himself, he knew it was _Ian_ who would be upset. Arousal hits Ian like a freight train, but they aren’t alone, and Mickey seems too fragile to even think about sex.  
“So I did some digging, found out who couldn’t be there when Mikhailo got stabbed. That’s a lot of work for the useless pieces of shit like you, but those who are innocent are currently sleeping or fucking, or whatever it is that you simple people do at night. You, on the other hand, have a high chance of dying tonight. This is how it will go. You speak up, one after another, and Mikhailo here will decide whether he recognizes your voice from yesterday, or not. Mind you, he is pretty high from all the good stuff I got for him, so he might make a mistake. I’m going to kill every single one of you that he points out. But I’m in a good mood, so I have an offer. I’m not going to kill you, if you voluntarily give yourself up. Of course I will still have to break your legs, because you disobeyed me, but it’s a small price to pay, hmm?”  
Ian watches with fascination as Valeska stalks the room with a smile on his face, and it his him that he is going to see someone being murdered. He’s seen dead bodies as an EMT, but murder is different.  
“They are fucked, I don’t think I can recognize their voices,” Mickey says loud enough for Ian to hear.  
“Don’t worry about it,” Ian whispers back. He genuinely doesn’t give a fuck if all of them die. Mickey is hurt, they deserve it. Whoever they are, they deserve it. And if people in this fucking place need a slaughter to leave Mickey alone, then so be it.  
The silence drags out for what feels like hours before someone finally decides to step out of the line. There’s nothing familiar about his face, and he speaks with a heavy accent.  
“I did it. He ratted out my people, Jerome, I couldn’t...”  
“Shh, Antonio,” Valeska really has done his research. “Who else?”  
Ian is surprised to see that another man joins Antonio even though his legs are visibly shaking. He is short and stocky, and there is no way he would be able to take Mickey down in a fair fight.  
“Miguel… I quite liked you,” Valeska sounds disappointed. “Is that all? You sure no one told you to attack Mickey?”  
It’s small, almost unnoticeable, but Antonio seems to hesitate before shaking his head, and it’s enough for Valeska to latch onto him.  
“Who else, Antonio?” Valeska’s voice is persuasive, and even Ian finds himself slightly entranced by the softness of his voice. It’s almost like Valeska is their friend who is simply looking out for them.  
“Gael came up with the plan.”  
“You stupid fuck!” the man who has to be Gael yells in English before switching to Spanish and throwing himself at Antonio. Valeska rolls his eyes, but because everyone is focused on the fight, Ian is the only one who notices the sudden appearance of a knife. It looks like a butcher’s knife, not something that can usually be found in prison.  
Valeska approaches the two men with a lazy gait, carelessly swinging the knife. Then, quick as a whip, jams the knife into Gael’s neck, cutting his screams short. Antonio is next, Valeska stabs him in the stomach five times and leaves him to bleed out on the floor. The plastic is starting to make a lot of sense. It will make the cleanup much easier, and there’s a lot of blood.  
“You said you wouldn’t kill us! I’ll do whatever you want!” Miguel tries to bargain.  
“Hmm, let’s see,” Valeska pretends to consider it, but Ian can see his grip on the knife tightening. “How about you die for me? I’d be happy with that. In fact...”  
Miguel tries to run. Ian can’t blame him for not thinking straight, but he doesn’t stand a chance. He runs into a guy built like a brickhouse, who grabs him like he is a paper doll and turns him around to face his fate. _That’s more than Miguel did for Mickey_, Ian thinks bitterly and doesn’t flinch when Valeska slashes Miguel’s face before moving to his stomach. It’s a gruesome sight, and Ian is sure he will have nightmares about it, but for now he is weirdly at peace with what he is seeing. Some of the blood reached his shoes, that will be a pain to wash off.  
The other Mexicans look terrified, but Valeska seems to be done with killing for the night. Ian hopes they tell everyone about what happened and no one tries to take Mick away from him again.  
The cleanup is mostly silent and very fast. Soon enough, the infirmary is spotless again. Ian is curious as to where the bodies will be disposed of, but not curious enough to ask Valeska.  
Once everything is back in its original place, everyone files out leaving Mickey, Ian and Valeska alone.  
“You can stay the night. Georgie will let you out in the morning.”  
Georgie is one of the nicer guards, who never tries to punish prisoners for the things they didn’t do or goad them into breaking the rules. Ian thought he could be trusted, but apparently Valeska already got to him.  
“Sleep well, baby,” Valeska murmurs, and Ian looks away when he kisses Mickey. He can’t not hear it, though, and it makes him more sick than the violence he just witnessed. But Valeska leaves, and Ian gets to sleep with Mickey in one bed.  
When he returns to his cell the next day, more rested than he’s felt in a while, he finds a pair of brand new shoes waiting for him.

Ian can’t go after Valeska, not after what he saw. At first he almost hoped Jerome staged a stabbing again to scare Ian, but the cold fury with which he murdered the Mexicans couldn’t be faked. Or the extent of Mickey’s injuries, because while he isn’t going to die, he also isn’t fine.  
And Valeska hovers.  
He lets Ian hang around Mickey alone most of the morning, but he joins them halfway through the day, focusing solely on Mickey. Ian would get angry, but… he has to acknowledge that their time in prison would be much more difficult without Valeska around. So he keeps his feelings in check, holding Mickey’s hand while his boyfriend talks to Valeska. At least they aren’t fucking with him around. Not that Mickey is up for much anyway, he tries to give Ian a blowjob, but the only angle that could work still irritates the wound. It doesn’t really matter to Ian, but he finds it adorable how much Mickey wants to pleasure him.  
They spend a lot of time cuddling. The beds in the infirmary are too small to fit both of them comfortably, but Ian doesn’t mind it when Mickey lies on him. He is going to miss that outside. He is going to miss so many things. He will visit as often as he can, of course, but he knows that life always gets in the way. And he knows Mickey will have moments of doubt, he will question Ian’s commitment. He wouldn’t be so worried about making it work if it wasn’t for Valeska. He can only hope Mickey can resist his advances without Ian around.  
Ian smooths his hand over Mickey's right cheek to wake him up gently, but it doesn’t work, so he pinches one of the slightly chubby cheeks. No matter how fit Mickey gets, his face is always on the rounder side. Cute.  
“...what?” Mickey mumbles, rubbing his face against Ian’s chest.  
“I’m getting released tomorrow.”  
“I know, I was there when they told you. We don’t gotta talk about it.”  
“We should. I will wait for you and visit as often as I can, you know that, right? I won’t… I won’t stray, alright. I’m all in.”  
“Jesus, Ian. I know. Don’t worry about it.”  
“Do you trust me?”  
After that, Mickey is silent for a long time. And really, as much as it hurts, Ian can’t blame him. He almost thinks his boyfriend fell asleep again, but then Mickey… Mickey fucking bites his nipple through the shirt, and not in a sexy way either.  
“Of course I fucking trust you, Gallagher,” the older man growls before Ian can properly complain, and yeah, he can take a bite if that’s what he gets in exchange.  
Ian doesn’t ask Valeska to take care of Mickey in his absence. He is too proud to ask, but he also knows that Valeska will do it without any prompting. He tries not to worry too much as he kisses Mickey goodbye.  
When he went in, he was terrified. Two years seemed like a lifetime. But now he is few steps away from freedom, and they are really hard to make. He looks back, even though Mickey is still stuck in the infirmary, before finally stepping out, completely ignoring the prep talk by the guard next to him.  
Lip is there to pick him up, but it’s a rushed welcome, since he has to go back to work. The house is empty, even Liam isn’t there to greet him, and it’s almost enough to make him go out to find a cop to attack, so he can go back to prison. Mickey would kill him though, and he doesn’t want to upset the injured man.  
In the evening, he finally gets to see the rest of his family, meets Lip’s baby momma. He likes Freddie, their son, but Ian always had a soft spot for children. Tami, on the other hand… She doesn’t seem to get the Gallaghers, and as much as Ian wants his brother to be happy, he doesn’t think she is the one who will give him that in the long run. At least they are still trying.  
When he goes to bed – he has his own bedroom now, he has a hard time falling asleep. He wishes he’s had something of Mickey’s that would carry his scent, but he has to rely on his memory. It’s hours before he falls asleep, but he wakes up early in the morning, like he did in prison.  
It hasn’t been a day yet, and he already misses Mickey.

For the first three days Ian lets himself rest. He doesn’t do much other than visit Mickey, easing himself into his new life as a free man. Four days after he’s been released he is still mostly asleep when he hears Debbie leave the house. He is the only one left now, and he wonders if he should take advantage of the empty house to masturbate. He dreamed of Mickey last night, and he can still feel heat pooling in his stomach, but he is feeling lazy, and his cock isn’t hard at all. It’s just a nice memory of Mickey’s body around him that keeps him warm.  
Someone interrupts his bliss by jumping on his hips. His first reaction is to clock whoever decided to attack him, and his hands are curled into fists even before he opens his eyes. When he finally does, he sees Mickey smiling wildly at him, hair messy and cheeks tinted pink. He smells like fresh air, and it’s so real… For a second, Ian worries his meds stopped working. He’s been taking them religiously for over two years now, so even if they did it shouldn’t be this drastic, but it’s the only thing he can think of other than…  
“Did you run away?”  
Mickey laughs at him and, instead of answering, kisses Ian, who makes sure to keep his mouth closed, aware of his morning breath.  
“Did you?”  
“No, you idiot,” Mickey finally says, still smiling. He looks happy, happier than he’s been in prison, which really isn’t that surprising. “I told you I made a deal with Jerome. I was going to kill him or die trying, but he promised me that I’ll get released at the same time as you if I fuck him. I couldn’t say no to that.”  
“Why didn’t you tell me?”  
“That was one of Jerome’s stipulations,” the older man shrugs before adding, “he likes to see you suffer.”  
Which makes a lot of sense, all things considered. Ian’s dick, asleep few minutes earlier, springs to life against Mickey’s thick ass, but the older man is still injured, so they settle on handjobs.  
Debbie almost cries when she sees Mickey later, and Ian can’t help but wonder if she still feels guilty about the way things went down. It might have been Mickey’s decision to help her, but she was the one who came up with the idea and let him take the blame. She was still a kid back then, so Ian doesn’t blame her – and he knows Mickey doesn’t hold a grudge either, but he can’t deny that their lives might have been easier if she took at least some of the blame back then. Ian does feel guilty about his own actions, but it’s something he has to live with forever.  
He doesn’t know what to expect from Lip when he comes over for dinner. He didn’t tell his brother everything, it’s not his place to talk about what Mickey had to do with Valeska, but he told him enough to convince Lip that Mickey had his back the whole time and sacrificed a lot to be with Ian. But it’s always hard to tell with Lip, who likes to lash out on others when his own life starts to crumble.  
That’s why he is surprised when Lip smiles at Mickey like he is genuinely glad to see him again, or when Mickey smirks back. He doesn’t question it, letting himself be happy. He doesn’t know if after-prison resolutions are a thing, but when he got released he decided that he will try to appreciate the small things that happen to him, and that he will be more patient with Mickey. And maybe less selfish too.  
Ian cries when they go to bed at night. He is so overwhelmingly happy with Mickey in his arms that he cries, soaking Mick’s shirt with his tears. His sniffling isn’t quiet, doesn’t have to be. They are alone in the room, and no one in the house would want to spy on them. So he lets himself cry, and Mickey holds him through it, muttering comforts. Ian doesn’t know what exactly his boyfriend is saying, but it doesn’t matter, his voice is more than enough to soothe him.

It’s good, so good, for a week. Seven days.  
Then there are police officers knocking on the door, and for a second Ian thinks Mickey lied to him about being released. But his boyfriend is so calm when he sees them, still completely relaxed, that it has to be something else.  
And it is, but it’s not exactly better.  
“Ian Gallagher and Mickey Milkovich?” the shorter officer asks. “I’m detective Garcia. Do you know Jerome Valeska?”  
Ian shrugs, not wanting to disclose any information before he knows why Garcia is asking about Valeska.  
“According to my sources the three of you were quite close in prison.”  
“I wouldn’t say close,” Mickey drawls out, “but we knew of him.”  
“Did he try to contact you recently?”  
“No, why would he?”  
“He escaped two days ago. You might want to watch out for him. Here is my number, let me know if he tries to get in touch with either of you.”  
“Fuck,” Ian mumbles, frozen to the spot. It’s Mickey who sees the detectives out and locks the door behind them. He doesn’t seem too concerned about Valeska’s disappearance. Or surprised by it. “Did you know? Did he call you?”  
“Yes and no. He told me he is going to do it when I was still locked up, said something about his brother having all the fun in Gotham. But he didn’t call me after, it’s a part of our deal.”  
Ian can’t breathe. Valeska is on the run, probably still in Chicago. Maybe he won’t ever leave, or he will take Mickey with him. Maybe Mickey is lying, and he is planning to run away with Valeska. He is so busy freaking out that he doesn’t even notice Mickey move, but suddenly there’s something hard in his hand, and when he looks down he sees a phone. Mickey’s phone.  
“...what?”  
“Look through the messages and calls, man.”  
“No, I...”  
“It’s fine, Ian. You can look.”  
He does, he is a shitty boyfriend, but he has to look. He finds messages from himself and Mandy, he doesn’t read them, but he knows her number. The calls are the same, except for one from Lip. Nothing worrying. No unknown numbers.  
“I’m sorry,” he finally whispers. “He scares me.”  
“It’s alright. Don’t worry about it.”  
“I love you, I really do, I...”  
“Shh, I know. I love you too. Let it go.”  
He tries.  
He tries to forget about Valeska, but it’s not easy when he is all everyone talks about on TV. Mickey ends up banning him from watching the news. He still manages to hear about it when Valeska makes it to Gotham and announces his return with a literal bang, blowing up a bank.  
He is almost completely back to normal by the time the letter arrives. There’s no stamp, so it had to be hand-delivered. There’s a note inside with few photos. Of him, mostly, up and around the neighborhood. Nothing exciting. Except someone had to stalk him to take the photos. The newest one is from two days ago. Valeska was already in Gotham, but the note says:

_Be a good boy and take care of my baby. It would make me really mad to see him cry, and we know how I get when I’m mad, so make sure that he doesn’t._

_XOXO,  
J_

His first instinct is to show it to Mickey, but then he thinks about it. Valeska has someone watching Ian and that’s, objectively speaking, terrifying. If he tells Mickey about it, his boyfriend will do something stupid like go to Gotham, and that’s the last thing Ian wants. He tells himself that Valeska is bound to get bored of them at some point. Or he might die, he isn’t immortal, no one is. Ian hopes Valeska dies a painful death.  
But, whether he likes it or not, they both want the same thing – for Mickey to live his best life. Maybe it’s not that bad. Ian doesn’t want to see Mickey cry either, and if it happens again because of him, then Valeska’s lackey won’t be able to get to him in time. Ian will put a bullet through his own head.  
He burns the contents of the envelope before Mickey comes home from the job interview. He is smiling, happy about the way it went, and Ian finds it easy to smile back. They are going to be fine.


End file.
